Funny things that we THINK we hear...

[Lynn Mc]

This thread is soooo good.   I have a funny to add.  Was in exercise class and we talking about creating a website with one of the women.  She started talking about working on a web site for her SEX Therapist!!!!   I could not believe what I was hearing.  Had to ask several times for her to repeat before I realized she was talking about her EX Therapist!!!!!   

[Rivergirl]

Lynn....very funny think the web site for her sex therapist would have been more interesting, sometimes we should not ask for clarification..........

[gringadactyl]

Addi: "Those cars always remind me of hippo's..."  *OK, I am sure you think as I thought this was where I was hearing her wrong...*

Me: "HIPPOS?  Really?"

Addi: "Yeah, a hippo...they are just long and comfy..."  *O-K-K-K...*

a few minutes later...

Me: "So how are hippos 'long & comfy'?"

Addi: "WHAT? They aren't COMFY..."
Me: "You said that they were COMFY..."

Addi: "I said CLUMPY!!"

Frankly my favorite part about this story are the moments that pass ...  I do that all the time:  "Hmm, I didn't hear that right.  Maybe if I just nod.  Huh.  But something isn't computing.  Comfy?  Hippos are Comfy?  What else could she mean, maybe pillows are comfy?  but then how could a suburban be like a pillow.  oh man so much time has passed now I'm going to look totally ridiculous if I ask.  But I must know!!"  Good times.

[Arasha]

It happened yesterday!  Before going for a ride with some friends in our motorcycles, I was seated on the bench while my husband and friends were getting ready the motos: 

My friend David approached me:    Are you “TIRED”? 
Me:    No I am not, actually I had eight  hours of  good sleep last night ...bla bla bla…
My husband:      Sweetheart, he asked if you are EXCITED!  

I love this thread 

All best,
Gloria

[sarahinPA]

well i started getting a funny sound!! Sometimes when Im sleeping, and I change positions i hear this weird crackling sound in my AN, now SSD ear..it only happens at night when im sleeping (or awake to move around) and doesnt last long. At first I thought maybe it was a dream, but since its happened more than once, I know its something real...maybe this is a part of the tinnitus, but its awefuly funny

[Rivergirl]

I was interviewing an inmate (I am a case manager in a prison) and he said he was raped by his grandparents.....I was kinda of shocked as this revelation surprised me, 99% of the time if there was sexual abuse it wasn't by both grandparents.  I gave him a sympathetic nod and we continued with the meeting.  He said something else and I said well you were raped by your grandparents, he gave me a quizzical look and said, "I said I was raised by my grandparents." 

[Anasazi42]

I read this one to my mom and we were both laughing so hard! 

I was interviewing an inmate (I am a case manager in a prison) and he said he was raped by his grandparents.....I was kinda of shocked as this revelation surprised me, 99% of the time if there was sexual abuse it wasn't by both grandparents.  I gave him a sympathetic nod and we continued with the meeting.  He said something else and I said well you were raped by your grandparents, he gave me a quizzical look and said, "I said I was raised by my grandparents."

[Kaybo]

OMGoodness!! That is one of the best ones yet!!

K 

[FLsunshine]

Watching the news the other night about a couple who set a Guiness Book record for holding their wedding underwater... guest included. 

TV:  ... "and the wedding couple were accountants"...
ME:  Honey, that's strange that the story ended with them being accountants... guess they were trying to save money (chuckle).
HUSBAND:  (quizzically looking at me)... huh?
ME:  Reporter said they were accountants.
HUSBAND:  No darling... she said they were ITALIANS!
ME:  (sheepishly)... oh.

[Rivergirl]

And they were accountants......lol

[MNTim]

In a recent conversation my friend was talking about the rigors of camping when he was young.  He was listing all of the annoyances when I heard him say "noise and sex".  I looked at him and said "what kind of campgrounds did you go to?"  He repeated slowly and loudly "noise, insects".  I immediately thought of this thread.

[Rivergirl]

Tim..... that is so funny, thanks for that one!!! gotta love this thread.

[Ancora Imparo Girl]

I love this topic. My friends are sad that I will be activated (BAHA) soon because their SSD clown will be able to hear again.

I was waiting for surgery and it was taking forever. The doc finally came in to explain that he was waiting for radiology to send over the CT scan of my temporal bones because he didn't want to "barrel into your skull" without them.

He walked out and my friend said, "that's good, huh?"

But I was confused. I wanted to know why the doctor was waiting for Daryl hall to call. Hahahhahaaaa

[Rivergirl]

That is funny, lucky your friend was there or you might still be wondering what Daryl Hall had to do with it.

[opp2]

We were driving in our vehicle the other day on a trip. Our youngest has three McDonald's all big alien monsters. They come in all kinds of colours.

I'm a police officer so when he said 'Rush, catch up and Bust her' I was wondering what he'd seen that I didn't...

Then my Husband said, the toys are green red and yellow, you know 'relish, ketchup and mustard'.

On a funnier note, that makes me laugh every single time until I cry...my husband took my kids out for dinner one day a few weeks ago to a place called East Side Marios. Their tag line is "badda boom badda bing" My husband has been having difficulty with his eyesight as he ages, and he didn't have his glasses with him. He will often squint and read menus.

So when it comes time for desert he says to the waitress, 'we'd like to try the Buddha Fingers'....she looks at him funny. My daughter says Daaaaadddd...and when he points at it on the menu the waitress says, 'it's Budda Bingers Sir'

Now I always ask him if he'd like some 'Buddha Fingers' when he makes fun of my hearing issues.