I'm sorry that your husband has been diagnosed with an AN. I hope that you'll both gain lots of useful information on this forum from others who've gone through similar experiences and that your husband will have a wonderful outcome! I think just about everyone would agree that having confidence in your surgeon (or radio-surgeon if you decide to go the radiation route) is of utmost importance, and that you should definitely select someone who has lots of experience with acoustic neuromas. This is certainly a situation where you want to go with a highly experienced AN specialist.
I had the translab procedure and agree with your conclusion that the facial nerve is identified early on in that procedure and, like you, am confused by what your surgeon implied. I was also a bit baffled by your surgeon saying that if you travel for surgery you should plan at the outset to remain there for one month just in case there are complications. I traveled from my home in New Jersey to a well-regarded AN medical establishment on the West Coast for my surgery and was told that I should be able to fly back home ten days after surgery (this is pretty much their standard procedure); it worked out well for me and I indeed returned home 10 days after surgery. That being said, no reputable surgeon will release you to return home before you're ready, and it's certainly a possibility that you'd need to extend your stay. What I'm questioning is your surgeon's assumption that you should just expect to stay somewhere for a month.
Obviously everyone has his/her own opinion about traveling for surgery vs. staying close to home. There are wonderful AN surgeons throughout the country, in or relatively near just about everyone's hometown. My local otolaryngologist recommended the place I went, my subsequent research convinced me that it was the best place for me, personally, to go, and I would do exactly the same thing again without any hesitation. My husband was able to accompany me, our only child is in graduate school (so I didn't have to leave any small children at home), and I didn't have any other constraints that would make travel difficult. This isn't true for everyone. I was also feeling absolutely fine (my only pre-diagnosis symptom was hearing loss) so I found the trip to be lots of fun, with plenty of sightseeing and activities during the four days prior to my surgery (it was a wonderful distraction) and felt well enough after my hospitalization to continue the "vacation" (although at a slower pace) before we returned home. I can certainly understand that a "vacation with surgery" does not appeal to everyone -- but it worked well for me.
One more thing -- if your husband hasn't received a second opinion, you might consider sending a copy of his MRI and audiology report to House Ear Clinic in Los Angeles. Detailed information is on their website. A physician will contact you a day or so after receipt of the MRI and give you a free consult over the phone.
Best wishes to you both as you continue your research! Please keep on posting here with any questions, and let the forum know as you make progress and reach a decision.