update on boy am I new at this

[Karla83401]

Hi Batty,

I am going to school for a degree in social work as that is the field that I have volunteered in for the past 20 years. I am considering an associates degree in criminal justice along with it in case money gets to tight before I get done. I do not want to lose my home because this is the only home our two youngest have known all their lives. This is also the place that both my mother and husband passed away at and for some strange reason that makes me feel safer here than anywhere else.

I miss my husband every day and that does not seem to diminish with time, it just seems that that overwhelming feelings of sadness are easing a little.

Take care,

Karla

[Battyp]

I've thought about being a social worker and at the school I taught out for 5 years it was more social work than teaching sometimes.  You can do it! 

I understand about the house thing.  My son is finally safe in our home that we moved into three years ago.  I'm trying not to lose it and have assurances from my parents that if push comes to shove they'll bail me out.  The security is so important to me and for him.  I just need to see him get through high school and his first two years of college then they can have the house  lol

I think the first year was the hardest and by year 5 we quit remembering certain days.  We used to go to his favorite rest on his bday but quit doing that I think it was around the 5 year mark.  My son didn't want to anymore.  I let him decide when he was ready.  We still talk about things as I want him to be able to remember his dad as he was so young when he died.

Great things have to be coming our way!

[Karla83401]

Hi Batty and all,

I am hoping to work with children in crisis or in the justice system. I think that several opportunities missed to make a difference in these children's lives and maybe I could make a difference in even one of their lives. I have been a Court Appointed Special Adovocate for the past 13 years for abused and neglected kids. That role has been one of the most important roles to me outside of being a mom.

As much as I love children I don't think that I am cut out to be a teacher. Teachers take on such a huge responsibility and their job requires so much more than just 40 hours a week. I think  that most teacher invest so much of their heart into our children and at a sub-standard wage rate. Okay I will get off my soap box now.

I think that the trauma of the death of a parent is reopened with each new stage or milestone in the child's life. I see this with my children on a regular basis. Our 17 yr old son took 2nd in the state in debate this year and I could see how much he wishes his dad was here to see that in his eyes. As our youngest who is now 12 goes through different stages I see her missing her dad over and over again.

Our home is really nothing special, in fact it is a modest, ranch home. But it is just that to all of our children and grandchildren. It is fun to sit back and listen to the kids get talking about "remember when we did..." and it always seems to come back to this house. So I will try to keep it as long as possible. I only owe for about 6 more years so I will work two jobs if I have to keep....that is after surgery. I also know that the older children will make sure I can keep it if I were to ask.

I need to close and get ready for school today. I have two classes that last about 6 hours today.

take care and smile often,

Karla

[Battyp]

Karla I'm with you..only I can't work one job right now    My son who's 15 has offered to get a job to help with the house expenses..it really breaks my heart not to be able to provide basic needs for a kid

There are times when he still misses not having a dad.  He makes jokes about it, but i know it bothers him.  Especially when he's done something outstanding at school and parents are asked to attend.  I know it's just not the same only having me show up sometimes. 

I agree about teachers.  My mom started teaching a sewing class and now realizes how much prep time goes into a lesson.  I know teachers average less than minimum wage if you count the hours against their time invested.  I guess when I started it was what I enjoyed doing plus I had my husbands income to help and it allowed me to be home in the summer with my son.  Now I'm not too sure about it  lol

Hope you have a great day at school!

[thecakes]

  Karla, I was  told that I have a tumor in Aug.02.  Not surprised at all.  I had all the signs of the tumor and was doing alot of reading up on it.  My surgery was'nt simple as no ones is.  Operation 12hr.  Then  they could'nt get me stitched up because I swelled.  Tryed repeatedly,3times.  I then went into a comma for 4 weeks, had a stroke, got  pneumonia, had 2 seusures, a blood clot, etc.  That was oct 02.  I went home in a wheelchair.  We were remodeling our house at the time and I came home to a different place, I did not remember changing the house at all.  Meanwhile,  the factory where my husband and I worked for 26 years decided to move to Mexico.  Joe was a forman and I had a well paying job on the floor.  So no jobs {not that I could do it anyhow} expenses of a remodeled house and a disabled wife.  Take good care off yourself.  You don't want to have a stroke.  I get disibility now and Joe drives a semi and tour bus.  My children are 21, 16 and 13.  The 2 younger ones keep me busy and a vollenteer at 2 different hospitals also.  Money is'nt as plentyful as it use to be,but we were good savers so we're getting by alright. Life is good again, but there is a God upabove, and he does let you know everynow and then, I won't forget it.  Life is good, embrase what you have.  Take care of those kids of yours, that will  keep you going,     Patti

[Crazycat]

Patti,

   I just read your last post. You've been through a lot. My heart goes out to you!!!!



                                               Paul

[Karla83401]

Hi Batty, Patty and everyone else,

I made it through school today and am now done for the week. I was not feeling very well during school though because of yet another "electrical storm" in my head. I hate it when that happens because I feel so sick during it and then am weak afterwards.

Patty, I am so sorry to hear about all that you have been through with your tumor. It also scares me because it seems like I am blessed with a life governed by "murphy's law". I have to admit that I am more scared about the surgery and subsquent problems then I am about a tumor at this moment. It frustrates me that I am being forced into surgery because of rapid growth and insurance issues.


Batty, I do understand how hard it is to know that we can't provide for our children. It makes me so sad and overwhelmed. My older children have said that they will help me if I ask but I just can't imagine doing that. They are all trying to support their own families and build their own futures. I am expecting my 17 year old to work this summer to pay for his gas, spending money and other expenses.

I need to post on the "stupidiest" thread about last night.

Karla

[minnkris]

Karla, BattyP and Patti,
My heart goes out to you. It seems you have had more than your share of woe. I agree with Matti, you are a source of inspiration.
Best wishes to you all.
Kris