I am an old time ANer, post surgery since 2000, so I only check in here once in a while. I read the first four pages or so of this thread. It is SO refreshing to see that someone started a thread on A Place to Vent. In the old days when I was a newbie and very active on the forum, there was a really good and healthy mix of positive cheery attitudes, and venting and whining types of posts. It seemed to me like a healthy balance.
When I first came back into the forum a few months ago (or was it a year ago?) I noticed that things did seem sugar coated. I had the sense that people were in general putting on happy faces (no pun intended, since I am one with facial paralysis!) or being very easily cheered up by responses from others when they did mention feeling bad. So I am happy to see now that people have been venting here. Some of the humor in the venting is really great too.
In addition to being an ANer, I worked in the counseling profession for twenty years and am now in private practice. I had written an article for people undergoing major life changes (such as brain tumors, job loss, relationship ending) and one of the points I make in it is that we need to be heard, and need a place to express ourselves. I also mention in the article being patient with loved ones who say the wrong things, because they don't know what to do sometimes except to try to cheer us up. People might say things like "when one door closes it opens up another one", which usually does turn out to be true in life, but when said at the wrong time in someone's healing/grieving over their lost good health, it can sound trite and unkind.
Well, enough to my bandwagon here. So here's to a place for venting! Kate
