While at first it seems like the treatment decision reduces down to surgery vs. radiation, there seem to be a number of people who have had to have both in some combination over time. Unfortunately there is no 'quick fix' but, fortunately, there are many successful outcomes from the respective choices.
I now look at surgery and radiation as two different tools to ultimately accomplish the same goal, with the choices along the way being completely unique to each person's situation: age, size & location of tumor, symptoms, lifestyle, occupation, insurance, etc
knowing the reality exists that you may need the other at some point.
Which is why I think it's imperative that we stay well educated on all the different surgery and radiation procedures. It was overwhelming to me at first. I had to buy a bigger briefcase for my notes from all the different doctors with file folders on each category. We nicknamed it the 'football' with all it's classified information!
But the most important part of the decision process for me was to connect with a team of doctors who really understood me, and respected the research I had done, supported my decision and could provide the most professional, state of the art expertise and equipment. And I didn't feel that way with some of even the 'top' doctors in Boston.
I went for radiation at a smaller hospital in Massachusetts with a Doctor I really connected with, and I'm at peace with my decision...Finding peace through this whole ordeal is an ongoing challenge but certainly enlightening on many levels.
My prayers are with you and your wife during this hard time...