Hi, Liz -and welcome to the ANA Discussion forums.
I'm sorry to learn of your ongoing headache issues and the fact that your doctors seem to just be placating you and not seriously trying to find the actual cause of the headaches. Unfortunately, this approach to headaches is not uncommon with some physicians. I don't know if your doctors include a pain management specialist but if not, I would seek one out. They tend to be more sympathetic and helpful for folks that are struggling with intractable headaches and they don't always rely on medications.
As for confronting your doctor(s), I would simply tell them that you want to explore another possible source of your headaches. If they're amenable to that, explain how you wish to proceed. If they try to refute or dismiss your wishes, find another doctor. Your doctor is not a god or your boss. When a physician isn't helping a patient and the patient is trying to be pro-active in healing themselves, the doctor should want to cooperate, not obstruct. This is why you may have to say good-bye to your present doctors, should they fail to take you seriously on trying another approach to quelling your headaches. Of course, one cannot presume anything and I trust your doctor(s) will be helpful in working with you on another approach to ridding you of your insistent, near-debilitating headaches.
I wish you much success as you try to move forward with solving your headache issues and yes, Captain Deb is our 'local headache guru'. Deb's willingness to share her years-long experience dealing with headaches and sometimes recalcitrant or simply disinterested doctors (as well as some good doctors) is a boon to other AN patients that suffer with unrelenting headaches. We're honored by her presence and buoyed by her unflagging sense of humor. I hope her suggestions and comments can help you - and I trust that they will.
Jim