Author Topic: revelation?  (Read 4805 times)

lora

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revelation?
« on: July 12, 2007, 11:41:26 am »
I was in line at the pharmacy this morning, the woman behind the counter called out "next" (I was on my safety walker--my daughter doesn't let me out of the house without it!) but the woman behind the counter said "no" you need to go to the handicapped line.  Now having never been refered to as such, I didn't know how to respond.  My gut instinct was to pull myself up and tell her she was mistaken, I am a vibrant, healthy 51 yr old woman who is just taking a break with this walker looking like a truck hit me, walking like I have been partying all night with said truck driver, or just meekly take my place behind the 84 year old woman in the wheelcair( I choose the latter).  Except for some balance issues, I think I am doing a helluva job adjusting, even to the ssd.  This kinda took the wind out of my sails.  Am I wrong to let this upset me?  Or is she just wrong?    Lora
4.7cm x all over my head, filling 4th ventricle, squashing the brainstem
translab by the awesome Dr.Tomaras 4/12/07
retrosigmoid, Drs. Tomaras and Steuer 6/4/07
GK in Oct. for the little bit left?
2007--the year of the head "what a long, strange trip it's been"

Sheryl

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Re: revelation?
« Reply #1 on: July 12, 2007, 07:24:32 pm »
Speaking of handicapped - it gets me so upset when I see people abusing the handicapped parking spaces.  Not the ones who have stickers, plates, etc., who do not "look" handicapped (because some handicaps are not visible), but those without the necessary credentials taking up a space.  For instance, today I was leaving a local CVS and there was only one handicapped place in front when an older man and woman drove into it.  I walked to the front of the car, to the back, and then looked around.  As the man got out of the car, my husband asked what I was doing and right in front of the owner of the car said I was looking for his handicapped placard.  The man said that he was only running into the store for a minute.  I mentioned what would happen if a handicapped car pulled up and needed the space - he pointed next to the car to a crosswalk!!!  I said that's not a parking spot and he just shrugged and kept on walking.  I would have taken his tag number but by the time someone would have shown up, he would be long gone.
Sheryl
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tony

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Re: revelation?
« Reply #2 on: July 13, 2007, 12:13:11 am »
The handicapped/disabled thing is a very heavy thing to carry
If challanged I say yes - I am 5% disabled...
- Then - Which makes me, 95% ABLE !
I would make it clear to all fellow passengers
on this ship - you perception is your reality
so care is needed when choosing words or titles
Best Regards
Tony

ppearl214

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Re: revelation?
« Reply #3 on: July 13, 2007, 03:27:52 am »
Sheryl (and all)

I have run into the same thing at CVS pharmacy... with limited HC parking.  I have an HC placard for parking and such... I walk with a cane (for reasons besides my AN, as well as my AN balance issue) and for the most part, people are considerate to me.  I try to joke with many, noting that my cane is a fashion statement... or if my walk/gait is very slow on a bad day, those holding a door for me will graciously wait for me and I'll tell that "I'm running, I'm running"... usually brings a smile to their face.

For the most part... people have been kind to me and my disabilities... but I do run into those morons that insist that their priority is moreso than those of us with disabilities that need a little extra time, that HC parking spot, etc... to those that carry that attitude... I raise my hand in disgust by showing a finger *coff* to those that earn it.

Yeah, Yeah... I've been known to "flip the bird"......oy.  Lora, hang in there and don't let it get to you... some folks and their behaviours of disrespect to those in need.... well.... they certainly prove themselves to me and I don't give them the honor of a second thought.....

Phyl
"Gentlemen, I wash my hands of this weirdness", Capt Jack Sparrow - Davy Jones Locker, "Pirates of the Carribbean - At World's End"

Brendalu

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Re: revelation?
« Reply #4 on: July 13, 2007, 05:23:17 am »
I probably would not have let it go.  I would have spoken to the store manager and then gotten home and written a letter to the editor of the local newspaper.  I have letters in the paper all of the time.  Not just because of ignorant people, but politcal issues, when someone is doing a great job, etc.  Having had those in makes it easier to get the pithy ones in.  I use spell check when I'm writing them and proof read.  It works..............most of the store clerks in my town know me by first name and treat me with respect and always, always ask if I need assistance of any kind.  (Probably because I have fallen in every store!)  I like, Phyl on occassion flip the bird to get my point across.  I figure I can do that because it took me until I was thirty five to get my fingers to work the right way. ???
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ppearl214

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Re: revelation?
« Reply #5 on: July 13, 2007, 12:15:47 pm »
You gals are a rough lot. I'll be sure to be on my best behavior if we ever meet in person..   ;D

Bruce

sma'at move on your pa'at for next time I fly from Bawsten to Hotlanta to visit mom! :)

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Battyp

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Re: revelation?
« Reply #6 on: July 14, 2007, 12:14:24 pm »
sheryl i'm cracking up....at about 9 mos mark when I was driving again I used to get so peeved especially when I needed the spot just to be able to get in the door for a gallon of milk. I mentioned to a guy that I didn't see his placecard and he litterally cussed me out telling me to mind my own business.  Well needless to say...this is the incident that led the doctor to putting me on lexapro. I pulled my car behind his, called the police-back as I had called on another car just previous to this one and when they asked me to stay I was like if this guy comes out I will run him over with my car and make him handicapped so he can feel the anguish I'm feeling. Needless to say the police told me to go ahead and leave and they would be ticketing him.  It is frustrating, I personally think they need to increase the fine to 1l,000 first offese and doulbe everytime there after.


Betsy

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Re: revelation?
« Reply #7 on: July 14, 2007, 02:48:37 pm »
I may be showing my age here, but I can remember a time before designated handicap parking places.  My Dad had MS and used a scooter, which we'd take apart and put in the trunk when we went somewhere.  When we arrived, we needed extra room around the car, so we'd usually part on the outskirts of the parking lot...far from the entrance.  Mom would help Dad with the scooter and my sister and I would go on ahead to look for curb cuts so he could get into the store or restaurant.  Of course, it would often be blocked by a car so we'd either wait around or try to find the owner of the car.  I never understood why Dad didn't get angry.  Looking back, I think he was picking his battles.  Oh , he lost his temper a couple times over the years, but I believe he chose to save his limited energy for the things he loved to do (you should see the deck he built!).  He's been gone for almost 4 years now, so I'll never know for sure.  But he's just as much a role model for me today, with my balance issues, as he was when I was growing up.

Betsy
15mm left side AN, diagnosed 4/25/07, radiosurgery via Trilogy 8/22/07.  Necrosis & shrinkage to 12.8mm April 2009

pearchica

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Re: revelation?
« Reply #8 on: July 15, 2007, 09:43:43 pm »
Lora: I am so sorry this happened to you.   :-[  And for the record put me in the tough babe crowd!!  Also in the type A crowd with Bruce to see the manager... I would like to think that I would have had a pithy sarcastic response to that woman for you Lora, but I only think of the right thing to say after the fact. 

As for the "handicap" placard and or extra services; My family recently flew up to Seattle to see my niece graduate from Nursing school. My mom finally decided to have a wheel chair- she is getting over a bad back but was having a hard time walking.  The group that flew with her had a great time- expidited service, special happy van to take them from the gate. My sister in law now wants to be the official travel guide for my mom!  So I guess it all depends on the treatment- it's cool to be compassionate and sympathetic, but irritating as hell to be patronized.

Okay just my two cents worth (really more like .5 cents) on this subject.. take care Lora and the rest of the AN gang- Annie
Annie MMM MY Shwannoma (sung to the son My Sharona by the Knack-1979)
I have a TUMAH (Arnold Schwarzenegger accent) 2.4 x 2.2 x 1.9CM. CK Treatment 2/7-2/9/07, Stanford- Dr. Stephen Chang, Dr. Scott Soltys

lora

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Re: revelation?
« Reply #9 on: July 17, 2007, 01:18:11 am »
Come on PPearl--We Yankees can rock the South again--we will just beat them with our canes!!!!  I did convince my daughter to let me out with my cane today- I did pretty good hitting 3 stores before I got tired (hey, one of them was Wal-Mart)   I can make it around the house with nothing.  So things are getting better.  I shook my head the other day (kinda like the dog after a bath) and I swear my balance got better)  Coincidence??? 
4.7cm x all over my head, filling 4th ventricle, squashing the brainstem
translab by the awesome Dr.Tomaras 4/12/07
retrosigmoid, Drs. Tomaras and Steuer 6/4/07
GK in Oct. for the little bit left?
2007--the year of the head "what a long, strange trip it's been"

ppearl214

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Re: revelation?
« Reply #10 on: July 17, 2007, 06:26:48 am »
hey Lora.... heck, use your cane if needed without consulting with your daughter... heck, it's a fashion statement! :)  Like you, I don't use it around the house (I'm a great "wall-walker") and try not to use it when I walk the dog (my physical therapist, who I go to for other reasons than my AN even noted what great therapy she is by pulling me one way and another to force me to work my balance by counter-acting her pull).... but otherwise, I use it, stand tall when I do... as an act of "you can try to knock me down with my balance issue" but this extra "leg" I use lets me accomplish a lot that I probably couldn't do....

The Yanks will rise again!

*takes cover from flying Georgia peaches being tossed at me by Brucifer!*

Phyl
"Gentlemen, I wash my hands of this weirdness", Capt Jack Sparrow - Davy Jones Locker, "Pirates of the Carribbean - At World's End"

lora

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Re: revelation?
« Reply #11 on: July 21, 2007, 07:37:20 am »
Yeah, nut my daughter has to pick me up if I fall!  Wall-walker--I wondered what to acall this thing I do around the house!
4.7cm x all over my head, filling 4th ventricle, squashing the brainstem
translab by the awesome Dr.Tomaras 4/12/07
retrosigmoid, Drs. Tomaras and Steuer 6/4/07
GK in Oct. for the little bit left?
2007--the year of the head "what a long, strange trip it's been"

Captain Deb

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Re: revelation?
« Reply #12 on: July 21, 2007, 09:34:50 pm »
OK here's my pissed off handicap story--I was flying home to the East Coast from HEI 4 weeks post op for a small AN which means BIG balance problems--hadn't tried walking unassisted yet.  US Air did manage to get me a wheelchair off the plane and they just stuck me at the gate and walked off. It was one of those wheelchairs that had to be pushed.  It was midnight--no skycaps. They said someone would come in one of those motorized trolley-thingys and get me to the bagagge claim.  My not-so-bright step-daughter, who was picking me up cuz Dr Love was out-of-town at a professional conference,  didn't think to try to talk her way past security to pick up a wheelchair-bound passenger. I waited and waited and waited.  When I finally saw the guy driving towards me 45 minutes later I was really relieved.  Just as he got to me this couple with 2 fat kids flags him down and climbs aboard, leaving no room for me.

Boy did I start yelling my 1/2 shaved head off! "Those kids sure don't look handicapped to me!! Hey you __ckhead!  Come back here!!"
The guy finally came back for me and took me as far as security. I had to hang onto the wall and get down the escalator myself.  I finally gave up and asked this nice really tall young man to walk me to the baggage claim because I'd (obviously) just had brain surgery and was loaded to the gills on Valium, and being from the South, he said he'd be glad to.  Finally found the step-daughter sitting there reading her fashion magazine, and she said "Geez, what took you so long?" Grrrrrrrrrr...........

Ever since then I've cultivated a spirit of "piratittude", particularly wenchly piratittude, which means life is too short to take crap offa people, and only give it when it is most deserved.  Pirates lose body parts all the time and they just sail ON!!!!

I think Phyll oughtta get a lil' skull and crossbones tatooed on the bird finger!

Me and Gennysmom are getting matching Tats as soon as we find ourselves in the same city with a good tat place--got it all designed and everything--skull and crossbones with a pink bow--there was just no time in Philly.

Lora, you rock on girl--that's a heckuva tumor you had there--ANs aren't for sissies. And don't take crap from NOBODY!!!!


AAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Capt Deb 8)
« Last Edit: July 21, 2007, 09:37:02 pm by Captain Deb »
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Sue

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Re: revelation?
« Reply #13 on: July 22, 2007, 01:26:31 pm »
My only thought is:  I've never heard of a "handicapped line" at a pharmacy before.  Is that supposed to help the handicapped or the unhandicapped?  Why would they differentiate between the two? 

Sue in Vancouver USA
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lora

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Re: revelation?
« Reply #14 on: July 26, 2007, 12:28:48 pm »
Sue--this was at the Kaiser pharmacy--I guess it is supposed to be a good thing.
4.7cm x all over my head, filling 4th ventricle, squashing the brainstem
translab by the awesome Dr.Tomaras 4/12/07
retrosigmoid, Drs. Tomaras and Steuer 6/4/07
GK in Oct. for the little bit left?
2007--the year of the head "what a long, strange trip it's been"