Am I losing my mind?

[tuckerro]

My name is Ron Tucker.  I am 35, and had a 7x14-mm Left Acoustic Neuroma, removed with Middle Fossa procedure done at the House Ear Clinic by
Dr. Derald Brackmann and Dr. William Hitselberger on September 26, 2006.

I am a year plus pos-surgery, and while I still have buzzing/ringing, in my surgery ear, I do have minimal hearing when I use a telephone or earphones, but not really otherwise.  I am healthy though, and have no facial, or nerve issues.

However, Post surgery, I have developed like a serious bit of  OCD.  The reason for my pose is that sometimes I find myself having to check and double check things I could have done in my sleep pre-surgery.  My truck has a horn when I lock it, however, almost every time I find myself questioning whether I locked it or not, and often walk back to it and relock it to hear the horn.  The garage door is another big one, with me sometimes, almost out of my subdivision, turning around and heading home to see for sure if the door went down.

I sound like a freak, and perhaps this isn't AN related, but does anyone else question themselves, kinda like a touch of OCS.  It seems to have worsened since treatment.  Is there literature or posts on that subject, being a side effect of AN?  Am I just  nuts?  Thanks for your time. 

Ron
 
 
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14x7 mm Left Acoustic Neuroma
Middle Fossa
House Ear Clinic
Dr. Derald Brackmann, Dr. William Hitselberger
September 26, 2006

[nancyann]

Hi Ron:  So glad to hear you had a great outcome.   Yes,  I have those same problems - mine deal more with going back to check that I locked the door, checking that I turned the car lights off.   At work checking that I did in fact put names on logs, etc, etc.   The list goes on & on.   I wasn't this way before.   You're not alone.

There is a great article/booklet that phyl had posted about cognitive issues,  unfortunately I'm really bad at computers or I'd put in the website name.  Hopefully someone who knows what I'm talking about will do it.   It is a great article, I have a copy at work.

Always good thoughts,  Nancy

[Mary 117]

Hi Ron. I have the same issue. I think many of us do. I'm not sure why. I have tried getting some help because I seem to forget things I really should know. I wish I had an answer but if it helps at least you're not alone.

Mary

2cm Middle Fossa, HEI, Dr. Brackmann,  05/24/05

[tony]

Yes I would chime in that it is "normal" in a post-surgery sense
The short term memory is down 25-50% and a fact of life - sadley
But there are 2 things you can do
1) get used to the idea of writing more down
- it will save some disc space !
2) the better your balance gets - the less memory space
will be used up - 1-2 hrs per week just doing light balance stuff
will payback in terms of years younger, in outlook and ability !
Go Get !
Best Regards
Tony

[OMG16]

Hi Ron I am not post op but I do find myself having the same issues with the car lock.  You are not crazy or else I think we would all be labled the same (lol).  I know my son since his surgery has had a great deal of problems in this area also.  He worked on it with a speech therapist that gave him different things to try that have been helpful.  So you may want to talk to your Dr regarding this.  Kisses to your forehead.    16

[HeadCase2]

Hi Ron,
  I do the same thing you do about the garage door, about the time I reach the edge of the neighborhood I question whether I closed the garage.  My wife now just rolls her eyes if I ask "Did I closed the garage?".

  The article someone mentioned is "Cognitive Aspects of Vestibular Disorders", at http://theblackriver.net/wobbler/wobblercognitive.html
 
   My guess is that when we have disturbances to the vestibular system, for example AN, that our mind has to do a lot more processing of vestibular data than it used to.  Which could possibly explain short term memory issues.
Regards,
 Rob

[Static]

Ron,
We are all part of the same club, and we are all going crazy together!    Nah, but I have the same problem and it has occurred not long after my surgery.  I figured it also had something to do with being under anesthesia for 11 hours.  Anyway, I always second guess myself, because I usually do forget something.  I am a Medical Driver and take Seniors to Medical appts, often taking different people every day and if I don't write their names down, I forget.  Matter of fact, I forget anyway, about a minute after I look at the name and/or time I have to pick them up I have to check again to see who it is and what time I have to get them!  So no, you are definitely not alone.  And for those folks who say "it's just part of getting older, it happens to all of us", no, this is definitely different, I had that feeling before surgery and this is more intense.  I can't explain it other than to say it's just different, end of story.  I think some folks either are just trying to make us feel like it's either not all that bad, or just blow it off like we are making more of it than it is.  Either way, bulldoody!  It's not an age thing, it's an AN thing, definitely, we've discussed it many times on this forum, so no, you are not losing your mind and no matter what anyone else says, we all love ya   
~Karen

[OMG16]

Karen I am so sorry to minimize what all of you are going through and am ashamed I have made you feel this way.  Please accept my apologies.  I know watching my son that it is an awful thing to deal with and I should have not made light of the situation.  I promise I will try my best not to do this again and please let me know if I upset anyone because that is not my intention at all.  Thank you for letting me know how I affect you and I have learned something here and am deeply remorseful.  16

[OTO]

Tuckeroo

I get a liitle OC when I'm tired or stressed after a tough week at the office.  I think its a bit of sensory overload.  Some weeks I'm as sharp as I was pre-surgery and other weeks I'm repeating myself (e.g., typing and sending the same email msg multiple times).... but all in all I'm feeling good.

[RE]

Ron,

I have a similar problem only it happens when someone tells me something and then get distracted by something else.  My wife get a little frustrated "I told you that 3 time already, how can't you remeber?"  Prior to surgery I could remeber the smallest detail in the most complex situation.  I had surgery on Oct. 25, 2007 and my memory does seem to be improving.  I played Hockey last night for the first time since the Tuesday before surgery and my balance is probably abour 95%.  I still have what I call benadryl head, if I move it fast I feel a little woozy. 

Rich

[candtlaw]

Hi Ron........ glad to hear that your surgery went well. Unfortunatly I was a bit like this befroe my AN diagnosis and treatment.... so IMO it may have to do with the AN itself...I relate to the garage door etc... I think about the oven, the curling iron etc... too. I have made many a long trip back home to check or I get really bothered with worry... I, in my former life, was a territory manager for a company where I delt with customers day in day out and negotiated deals etc... and looking back, I would totally lose my train of thought and start rambeling kinda like the USA lady that they show on the news with the education question! Luckily being female in a males profession I was usually forgiven! lol.............. It has to have some affect in my mind as it is in our brains... I just hope that is gets better with time and considering we have had treatment that it will shrink and quit causing such behaviors... hang in there. oh yes, I do take anxiety meds now and NEVER had problems before.....they do help a bit......gl

[candtlaw]

thank you BTW Headcase2. That article was most interesting and explains a ton to me.  WOW

[Yvette]

Hey all, is this something that middle fossa folks usually have to deal with? As a translaber I wonder if this is not an issue since the point of entry for surgery is so much farther back.

Yvette

"Cut folks some slack, cuz one day you'll need someone to cut you some." Oprah Winfrey

[lori67]

Good question, Yvette...  does that mean we translabs don't have to worry about losing our minds?  Or could it be we've already lost them so we don't notice any difference?

I have to say, I do have my OCD moments, but I was known to have them before the surgery too, so I think mine was a pre-existing condition. 

So, Ron, if you've lost your mind - I think we all have, so at least you won't be lonely! 
Lori

[tuckerro]

Sorry all, for being Missing in Action.  I got busy with work, and wasn't able to log on for awhile.  I really appreciate all of your posts on the issue.  I am happy that i'm not the only one that seems to have experienced this repetitive nature, or need to check and double check things.

My spouse, as Rob stated, and now kids, just as soon as I turn to even start asking if the garage door went down, all in unison state "its down!"

Going out of town is trying for me with this new "affliction."  I have been on say 10 trips out of town since my surgery.  Those seem the worst, because in my absence, I want to be certain the dog's been taken care of, the garage shut, lights off, alarm on, etc, etc.  I have on the occassions the kids stay home, call them and have them check something that I just can't remember doing or not. 

The memory is at times an issue also, as one of you stated.  My spouse often repeats herself, and becomes anxious when it takes me 2-3 times sometimes to remember something, when pre-surgery, I remembered numbers, names, and a lot more than I do now.  I have to admit, that makes work hard sometimes as a trial lawyer, since I find myself off my game from time to time, which makes me have to work twice as hard at what used to come naturally, and write down more things, which I used to be able to just spat off by heart.

Work and life are made worse, I think by whether I am tired, which magnifies this problem.  I am not at that level, but am curious, has anyone heard of anyone filing for disability at work, or just in life, because these issues have gotten worse?  Do you post-ops with more time out than me feel this gets better or worse over time???

I appreciate the time in responding, and hope my post finds all of you well, or as reasonably well as can be expected.

Ron
 
 
----------------------------------------------------
14x7 mm Left Acoustic Neuroma
Middle Fossa
House Ear Clinic
Dr. Derald Brackmann, Dr. William Hitselberger
September 26, 2006