Author Topic: Watching the Tube - A poem  (Read 10541 times)

G_Man

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Watching the Tube - A poem
« on: September 28, 2012, 11:32:11 pm »
I'm not a poet but every once in a while something comes to me.  I offer this one with some part of my tongue in cheek.  I dedicate it to all of you but especially to those of us who are blessed enough to be watch and wait.  Don't damn me for my grammar thou.

             Watching the Tube
         
   Every year the time comes around.
   I go to that place with all the loud sounds.
   I lie on the table hard as a board.
   And get my head clamped down like in a psychotic ward.
   I slide in the tube that goes all around.
   My ears stuffed with foam, my thoughts do abound
   The room goes all quiet and then they begin.
   I lie there in wait through the jarring and cringe.
   The sounds and the banging like the walls might be thin.
   I freeze like a statue and want it to end.
   I stare straight up at the ceiling all  white.
   It isn't really darkness nor is it light.
   I'm there in that place but I'm really not there.
   My thoughts go to sailing without any care.
   The tube it does sputter, groan and moan all around.
   Sometimes I think I'll be sucked into the ground.
   The scene it gets quiet for a short time and then.
   They shoot the gadolinium in while you mend.
   It's time for the banging to start up again.
   The shaking and whining is worse than before.
   I'm thinking of bolting right for the door.
   The door it is thick like a human vault.
   So I buckle down for the final assault.
   Staying in so I don't have to start over again.
   And then it is over but I can't believe.
             How I was so able to do the statue like freeze.
             The week as it passes I'm in nowhere land.
             Thinking of news that I can withstand.
             I go to the man whose shiny and white.
             Who gives me the news that I will be rite.
             Back down there when the year turns and then.
             I'll climb in and do it all over again.
Diag: 08/11/2009 Left side
AN: 0.6cm.  65% Hearing loss, tinnitus, fullness, minor motion issues.
hearing loss over 25+ years.  MRI in 2000 showed nothing.
Optical Atrophy from infantcy
Watch and Wait.
As of 2017 I am on a 2 year MRI frequency.

skipg

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Re: Watching the Tube - A poem
« Reply #1 on: September 29, 2012, 01:09:15 am »
Thanks for the humor and truth rolled into one. I needed to smile right now, at least until the hydrocodone kicks in and I can get to sleep. The tinnitus is driving me crazy tonight,
Skip
Self diagnosed 11/17/2010 (love the internet)
MRI 12/2010 Official diagnosis 1/3/2011 RT AN 7x6x4mm's
MRI 6/17/2011 no change still 7X6X4
MRI 7/20/2012 growth spurt to 14mm
Aug 8th consult and decided on Proton Therapy
Proton Therapy @ Hampton Proton Institute,       done on 11/20/12

Suu

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Re: Watching the Tube - A poem
« Reply #2 on: September 29, 2012, 04:43:30 am »
 ;D ;D ;D
4cm Left side AN Translab August 18th 2010
Facial nerve not working
Nerve conduction Jan '11 Repeated 23rd May '11
SSD left side
5 ops in 6 weeks to fix CSF leaks
Tarsorrhaphy 9 Mar '11 Extended 26 Aug '13
Sling Thur 16 June '11
12/7 nerve graft 9 Feb '12

CHD63

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Re: Watching the Tube - A poem
« Reply #3 on: September 29, 2012, 05:52:43 am »
Thanks for sharing the poetic version of what we all have or still have to endure!  Might as well smile about it!

Clarice
Right MVD for trigeminal neuralgia, 1994, Pittsburgh, PA
Left retrosigmoid 2.6 cm AN removal, February, 2008, Duke U
Tumor regrew to 1.3 cm in February, 2011
Translab AN removal, May, 2011 at HEI, Friedman & Schwartz
Oticon Ponto Pro abutment implant at same time; processor added August, 2011

Cheryl R

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Re: Watching the Tube - A poem
« Reply #4 on: September 29, 2012, 07:30:47 am »
Great poem!       Wonder if they would put it in the newsletter!              Descxribes it to a T,only the one I do it in is very light inside.            Still not my favorite thing to do.              Cheryl R     
Right mid fossa 11-01-01
  left tumor found 5-03,so have NF2
  trans lab for right facial nerve tumor
  with nerve graft 3-23-06
   CSF leak revision surgery 4-07-06
   left mid fossa 4-17-08
   near deaf on left before surgery
   with hearing much improved .
    Univ of Iowa for all care

G_Man

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Re: Watching the Tube - A poem
« Reply #5 on: September 29, 2012, 08:37:23 am »
The poem came to me while I was brushing my teeth last night.  It took about 40 minutes to write up.  I could have poured over it for a month and made it better and probably much longer but I'm glad I just did it in the moment.
I'm also happy that I've got positive responses.  I wasn't sure how it would go over.
Diag: 08/11/2009 Left side
AN: 0.6cm.  65% Hearing loss, tinnitus, fullness, minor motion issues.
hearing loss over 25+ years.  MRI in 2000 showed nothing.
Optical Atrophy from infantcy
Watch and Wait.
As of 2017 I am on a 2 year MRI frequency.

skipg

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Re: Watching the Tube - A poem
« Reply #6 on: September 29, 2012, 03:12:01 pm »
Spontaneity works wonders when it occurs at just those unusual times. Thanks again and keep brushing.
Skip
 
Self diagnosed 11/17/2010 (love the internet)
MRI 12/2010 Official diagnosis 1/3/2011 RT AN 7x6x4mm's
MRI 6/17/2011 no change still 7X6X4
MRI 7/20/2012 growth spurt to 14mm
Aug 8th consult and decided on Proton Therapy
Proton Therapy @ Hampton Proton Institute,       done on 11/20/12

MK30

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Re: Watching the Tube - A poem
« Reply #7 on: September 29, 2012, 04:38:06 pm »



       Perfect description!
Dec., 1967: remove baseball-size A N left side.
Feb. 1968: 7/12.  June, 1968:temporalis transplant
Nov.1987:remove AN regrowth. Nov.1991:remove AN regrowth; 1993: Discover new AN on right side.  Watch & wait.
Annual MRIs since then. 2002: enlarge auditory canal.  3/'12  survive  run-over by car.

leapyrtwins

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Re: Watching the Tube - A poem
« Reply #8 on: September 29, 2012, 09:33:54 pm »
Actually I've come to love my time in the Tube of Gloom - strangely I find it very relaxing despite the clanging.

Love the poem, though   ;D

Jan
Retrosig 5/31/07 Drs. Battista & Kazan (Hinsdale, Illinois)
Left AN 3.0 cm (1.5 cm @ diagnosis 6 wks prior) SSD. BAHA implant 3/4/08 (Dr. Battista) Divino 6/4/08  BP100 4/2010 BAHA 5 8/2015

I don't actually "make" trouble..just kind of attract it, fine tune it, and apply it in new and exciting ways

G_Man

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Re: Watching the Tube - A poem
« Reply #9 on: September 29, 2012, 09:49:20 pm »
Actually I've come to love my time in the Tube of Gloom - strangely I find it very relaxing despite the clanging.

Love the poem, though   ;D

Jan

Jan
         I wish I would have thought of "tube of gloom" LOL.
It was kind of fun to put into words, in a darkly humorous way, one of the smaller inconviences we go throught that most people will never know anything about.
G_Man
« Last Edit: September 29, 2012, 09:51:28 pm by G_Man »
Diag: 08/11/2009 Left side
AN: 0.6cm.  65% Hearing loss, tinnitus, fullness, minor motion issues.
hearing loss over 25+ years.  MRI in 2000 showed nothing.
Optical Atrophy from infantcy
Watch and Wait.
As of 2017 I am on a 2 year MRI frequency.

It is what it is

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Re: Watching the Tube - A poem
« Reply #10 on: October 16, 2012, 09:43:55 pm »
Thanks for sharing.  It describes the experience perfectly. 

Karen
.7cm, left side AN , Tinnitus, Hearing preserved, Middle Fossa 8/1/12 at HEI, Drs Friedman and Schwartz, Sharing your story is extremely helpful to me.

Soundy

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Re: Watching the Tube - A poem
« Reply #11 on: October 18, 2012, 11:52:13 am »
Actually I've come to love my time in the Tube of Gloom - strangely I find it very relaxing despite the clanging.

Love the poem, though   ;D

Jan

I sleep through them....go figure
3mm AN discovered Aug 2004
Translab July 2 ,2007
3.2cm x 2.75cm x 3.3cm @ time of surgery

G_Man

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Re: Watching the Tube - A poem
« Reply #12 on: October 18, 2012, 08:20:10 pm »
A couple of times I almost fell asleep but if I did I know I would wake with a jolt.  If only they would just knock me out and then it's done. 
Diag: 08/11/2009 Left side
AN: 0.6cm.  65% Hearing loss, tinnitus, fullness, minor motion issues.
hearing loss over 25+ years.  MRI in 2000 showed nothing.
Optical Atrophy from infantcy
Watch and Wait.
As of 2017 I am on a 2 year MRI frequency.

arizonajack

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Re: Watching the Tube - A poem
« Reply #13 on: October 18, 2012, 09:39:36 pm »
I read the poem and got inspired. Couldn't help myself so here is my contribution to the Poet's Corner. If it has a familiar cadence, well, I'm shameless when I do stuff like that.


Once upon an MRI table
So noisy I thought it was the Tower of Babel.
I mused and pondered my neuroma of yore.
As I lay there weak and nauseous
From the contrast in my veins,
Suddenly a voice from nowhere
Asked what music I would like to hear.
Golden oldies did I tell her,
Told the voice from out of here.
Only those and nothing more.

Ah, distinctly I remember,
It was in the bleak December,
That I lost my right side hearing
And heard weird tones from in my brain.
Along with tones I had bad balance,
Like as drunk but without drink.
What is this, I wondered,
That has been inflicted,
Inflicted upon me evermore.

A timely visit to the doctor led me to the ENT.
Led me to the ENT who sent me
To the noisy MRI.
MRI that found neuroma, shock that put me an a coma.
Filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before.
T’is some error, did I mutter.
Only this and nothing more

Alas, alack, it was no error.
Neuroma present, albeit small.
ENT said watch and wait,
I resigned me to my fate.
Six months later, on the table.
Golden oldies in my ear,
Long I lay there, wondering, fearing,
Dreaming dreams no mortal
Ever dreamed before.

Shortly after, went to records,
Filled out form and got CD.
Brought it home to view the image
And this mystery explore.
Let my heart be still a moment,
And this mystery explore.

Sure enough, neuroma grew some,
Thing of evil from horror’s shore.
Then methought of how to kill it,
Cut it out or zap it dead.
As of now I still am thinking,
Thinking how to kill neuroma,
So it bugs me nevermore.
3/15/18 12mm x 6mm x5mm
9/21/16 12mm x 7mm x 5mm
3/23/15 12mm x 5.5mm x 4mm
3/13/14 12mm x 6mm x 4mm
8/1/13 14mm x 5mm x 4mm (Expected)
1/22/13 12mm x 3mm (Gamma Knife)
10/10/12 11mm x 4mm x 5mm
4/4/12 9mm x 4mm x 3mm (Diagnosis)

My story at: http://www.anausa.org/smf/index.php?topic=18287.0

G_Man

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Re: Watching the Tube - A poem
« Reply #14 on: October 19, 2012, 06:05:37 am »
Wait a minute!  You get music!!!  Don't know how I would really hear or enjoy music under those conditions.  It would probably ruin me for music. 
Diag: 08/11/2009 Left side
AN: 0.6cm.  65% Hearing loss, tinnitus, fullness, minor motion issues.
hearing loss over 25+ years.  MRI in 2000 showed nothing.
Optical Atrophy from infantcy
Watch and Wait.
As of 2017 I am on a 2 year MRI frequency.