I have operation for a large AN that was starting to grown into my brain stem about 3.5 years ago. I lost my site and hearing on right side and paralzed partly. Then about this time last year the small part they could not remove but cut off the blood supply picked up another blood supply and started growing again. I had CK at Georgetown University Hospital little over six months ago. I was two see the doctor in Feb which I did but they made a mistake and did not have me have MRI before hand. So I scheduled that a week later there was a mistake in getting the imagine to the doctor, till this past week. I am waiting to hear back what is up. So far I have not had many head ached (a few) now the allegries and sinus season here, My balance is bad (sometimes I feel like I am walking drunk) which I know I am not drunk! . I am praying for good results. Lately I feel little down, like crying which most of time I don't but today I have been in tears for no apparent reason. I think it is everything that has been going on the last 4 years with AN, back, knee problems. and work has been pressure on me since December (not because of the AN, they have been great on that), a new co-worker (which when contract ends in late fall she will not be renewed she is lazt, and not on maternity leave tilll end of May (so I am basically handling twice the work). Everyone at work depends on me and relies on me to get it done and know the answers. Part of the pressure at work I but on myself which I have to say to myself I am not a superwoman.
I have no real support here in area my sisters are great but 4 hours away and don't understand sometimes, it is like I should back to normal. And I hear will we are 7 and 10 years older then you. My closest friend is about the same as them but she has come around more since she seen me one Sat when my balance was really acting up; and we were going some where, she said you feel like going, I said yes.
I just don't know what to do when I feel like today down and want to cry but I don't want to show that side of me. I have been mostly upbeat in this. What has others done out there when they get down (which I am sure they have).
Thanks for listening to my rumbles I needed to get it out to others that would understand.