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should I tell

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Jeanlea:
I told my grandma, who is 81, about my surgery only because I knew other people would tell her anyway since we live so close to each other.  Just knowing what I know about your situation you might want to consider waiting to tell your mother until you are done with your treatment.  It sounds like you have support from others and don't need it from her.  As long as there is no one else that is likely to tell her, I see no harm in waiting.  But you have all the background info.  Good luck to you.

Jean

matti:
My grandmother was 85 when I was diagnosed and I was very hesitant about telling her as she was not in good health. I decided I had to because I knew she would find out, so I approached it like Joef and did not use the term brain tumor, instead telling her it was a tumor in the ear. After my surgery, she did find out the full extent of what I had and was actually thankful that I had told her in the manner in which I did.

I know this is a very tough position to be in, you know in your heart what is best.

Take care and keep us posted, let us know the date of your CK, so we can all wear our magic pirate socks.

cheryl

Battyp:
I agree tough call but...it doesn't sound like your mom lives close to you?  Given what you said I wouldn't tell her the extent of what you have I think I'd just leave it as you're having to have a procedure if you tell her anything at all.  For my my mom was the first one I told as I knew I'd need her support with my son if something happened to me (plus I live 10 mins from her).  I know my brother who lives in seattle tends to tell mom after the fact of stuff to spare her the worry (his wife is a nurse who runs an oncology floor so she's more helpful anyway).  She does actually appreciate it most times after she gets over the inital mad  LOL 
Have you talked to your siblings to see what they say about it?
Keep us posted on your treatment...we like to put on our pirate socks!

marystro:
Hi flier,

I did not tell my mom who is 77.  But having my brothers and close friends with me from the beginning was most helpful.  These "younger" folks are much more up todate with technologies and can lend clarity, calm and shoulders to cry on.  A few weeks after my treatment, I told my mom.  I was totally surprised that she took it so well and even understood the radiation medical language.  She even advised me that I need to have on-going monitoring, eat well, exercise, the whole bit!  I guess I am always a little girl in her mind and must be reminded of how to live as most mothers do  ;).

So, it really depends on how YOU feel and whether your mother is up to it given her own situation.  Sounds like she already has a handful with her own condition.  Sorry to hear about that.  I will be thinking about you with Alex's pirate socks on Nov 3.

Mary

kat:
HI

Everyone is different and must make their judgement accordingly. We chose not to tell my Father in law who is 81 and worries terribly about everything . We lost my mother in law just before I got my diagnosis and it really was not a good time for any more bad news . Since I had GK and no visible after effects it was not too difficult to keep it secret ,in fact only my closest friends know . I my case that was the best choice .

Regards Katarina

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