Would you spare telling your children of the GK?

[sewnice50]

Thank you all for your comments.  I can't begin to tell you how much I appreciate your thoughts, I will tell my son.  Katmumof3, sugar coating is a good idea.  It is benign after all.  Now I have to come up with the words....
Sue

[FlyersFan68]

If this were me then "YES" i would definitely inform my children about the tumor and procedure. My mother was always one to hide things from her children especially me since I was the youngest. This actually bothered me very much. I think your children will appreciate you more (not that they don't appreciate you now) but we all need to be reminded that our loved ones won't be around forever. I know this is not a life threatening disease but this will make your loved ones think more about you and life in general. I am slightly older than your son at 37. We are far from children anymore. I tell my children every night that I love them and spend as much time with them as possible. My daughter (Jordyn) was actually born on the exact date of my surgery one year later. I took that as a sign from God telling me that everything was alright now. These tumors can be scary at first despite being told 99% of them are benign. When I was told I thought I was dying. I knew absolutely nothing about AN. Today, I am doing fine. I hope all goes well for you and I hope your children know soon and will be there for you if you should need them.

[britbert]

Sue,

What bothered me most about your post was that your two best friends haven't talked to you about your tumor/surgery. I know that everyone reacts differently. But I was wondering why you haven't brought it up with them again. I make my best friend go out to dinner with me every year on the anniversary of my surgery (our husbands watch the kids). I need support from her, too. But I had to initiate it so that she would know how important it is to me.

I hope my comments aren't taken the wrong way, I am just concerned for you.
Brittany

[Chris]

Hi Sue,
So, did you tell your son? I still haven't told my mum. I figure I won't need to tell her unless my symptoms became physically obvious. I understand other's comments regarding family etc but my mum was looking after my very ill dad until recently. She has coped with his death amazingly well, on the outside, but I still can't stand the thought of putting her through more stress. I guess she probably will be annoyed with me if she finds out but I am such a chicken.
Regards
Chris   

[SuzeAN]

Hi, I was just reading this, and thought about how little I told my kids, they were 6 and 9 last year when I had CK for my AN.  And I think I really didn't go into detail because I didn't want to scare them.  So basically I "sugarcoated" the situation.   However, I think if I had to go in to the hospital for micorsurgery craniotomy etc.... I would have been more specific with them.  Right now I am going to schedule my MRI for my year check up.  When I had my films, I didn't show my children, because I was upset and found it disturbing to look at picture of that thing in my head.  However on the flip side, I understand the friend reaction because I have friends like that too, they just never mentioned it again...its like having radiation zapped through your head is like getting a tooth filled,  perhaps they really don't understand the severity of the situation.

Cheers to all,
Sue (Las Vegas)
PS Just an observation..are people with variations of the name Sue more likely to develope ANs than those with other names???

[Chris]

Hmmmm Sue, you might be on to something there lol

[BusyBonnie]

I told both my son and my daughter when I found out. They are 6 and 7 years old. I used simple terminology and explained I was not going to die or anything. I even explained what would happen if I have surgery. My son was very upset ( he's the 7 year old ) for two days. His teacher knows about it so she let me know he was upset. He was afraid of me being in the hospital for so long. Even a few days to a 7 year old is long. I just explained to him that I may not have surgery and I'm actually thinking of going with Cyberknife. I told him how cool the equipment is and he seems fine now. I have told all of my family and friends, coworkers, anyone that will lend an ear. It helps me to deal with it and I have always been an open an honest person so it's difficult to keep things to myself. Everyone has been very supportive especially at work which helps. I think hiding it just makes things more difficult on yourself and to your family. They understand your mood changes better once they know what is going on. Just my opinion but I thought it could help.


Lana