Firstly I apologize because this posting will not be short.
Wow you guys are amazing! No sooner have I posted my last and final note on the board (as I was truly disgusted at the belligerence exhibited by some members) than my personal e-mail is flooded by you all saying "stay!!!!" Thanks for all the soothing words and irrefutable evidence that there are some on this board whose sole reason for posting seems to be mean to others.
Frankly I just don't have time for that type of rubbish. LIfe's too short and I'm out there living it. I chose CK over the other treatments for many reasons, mostly becuase retaining my hearing is of vital importance to me. I've said I'm a musician (used to be a professional one too) but now I'm involved in complex global trade negotiations and I really need to hear what someone's whiserping to me in the sidelines of a meeting. That can make or break the deal! So hearing was my prime decisionmaking factor.
I don't have any problem with people having microsurgery - I say good luck to them. Their road ahead is so much tougher than mine. And I respect the wonderful microsurgeons at HEI who were frank, honest and readily available to answer the multitude of questions I posed. I think all the doctors who treat ANs, both micro and radiosurgeons, deserve a medal. You don't knwo how good you have it here in the US. These doctors are truly the best in the world.
And everyone on this board was so very helpful to me in the awful time you all know so well in the lead up to making the BIG DECISION. To be honest, I really appreciated hearing about the path each person had taken to treatment, their experience of that treatment, and the quality of life issues they have had to deal with post treatment. Without that, and the personal touch of a couple of guys (you know who you are) who patiently listened and replied to dozens of my e-mails and even assisted when I'd chosen my treatment method I think I would have gone crazy. But this type of behavior is what a support group should be. Not the stupidity of a few who feel threateneed by others' choices.
Yes, we who choose radiosurgery aren't given an iron-clad guarantee that our tumor will perish. But personally speaking I live each day as though it's already dead. I don't think about it, I don't dwell on the "what if they didn't get it all the cells" or even "what if the darn thing swells and squishes my brainstem". I imagine some microsurgery folks must have wondered "what if they didn't get all the cells" too. But those of us who have chosen radiosurgery and those of us who have had successful microsurgery go on and live our lives to the fullest of our ability. The one thing I've learned about having an AN is how mentally strong it's made me, and how I grasp each day with so much more zest than before. That's why I don't have time for the stupidity that seems to be going on in parts of this site about different forms of treatment.
You know no one on this site is stupid. The newly diagnosed post here not be told "the magic cure" because we all know that simply doesn't exist. They want to hear everyone's experiences. They want to read all the research material, even the material that criticises other forms of treament. That's what you do when you're deciding - you read, you listen and you ask advice. Then you get to sort it all out yourself and make your own decision. And you live by that decision, however great or difficult the result is. It's truly unhelpful when new people logon and find members being just plain nasty to each other.
So I say let's make this site THE benchmark. I challenge every member to post only their personal experiences and links to research material, and to avoid heresay, gossip and belligerent postings. Life's too short.
CC
