Author Topic: i am so nervous, i am so nervous, i am so nervous!  (Read 2436 times)

superrmaren

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i am so nervous, i am so nervous, i am so nervous!
« on: June 25, 2006, 06:22:17 pm »
hi all
i have my first appointment at johns hopkins on friday
i am beyond nervous!
my MRI revealed a 4cm AN. i know i have to have surgery. no two ways about it...
i am currently directing a musical with my community theatre...if i have the sugery soon, i will be missing out on that (which i realize is trivial compared to the AN/surgery) but ya know, it's what i do. and i am already so invested it seems like the end of the world to me.
i have an interview on wednesday for a high school teaching job and i am incredibly excited and have my hopes sooooo high -- if i dont have the surgery soon enough and i get the job, what if i miss the first days of school???
i am so stressed and angry and nervous and sad all at the same time -- this is the worst
and to top it off, i've never had any sugergy!! (well, i had my wisdom teeth out - lol)
i don't know what to expect at all -- could you shed any light on the actual sugery/post surgery experiences you had??
thanks
  >:( :o ??? :'( :-\
maren
"the good old days weren't always good, and tomorrow ain't as bad as it seems"

4.5cm tumor resected at Johns Hopkins in 2006.  Drs. Tamargo and Minor
numerous facial plastic surgeries
12-7 nerve graft 2008
platinum eye weight removed 2009
deaf right - BAHA
residual balance issues
severe dry

Desilu

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Re: i am so nervous, i am so nervous, i am so nervous!
« Reply #1 on: June 25, 2006, 06:42:29 pm »
Hi Maren,

Try to calm down! You will be ok. Talk to your doctors and see what they say about your surgery.  They may let you wait awhile. You have to take care of yourself first before you can try to help others. Maybe you can get someone to fill in for you and direct the musical for you. As far as the new job, I would say to be as honest as you can and explain the situation with them. If it was meant to be, you will still get the job. If not, then there are better plans for you in the future. Keep a postive attitude and hang in there.  Ann
HEI July 26, 2005
5mm X 8mm Left AN
Middle Fossa
Dr. Brackmann & Dr. Hitselberger

jacobs

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Re: i am so nervous, i am so nervous, i am so nervous!
« Reply #2 on: June 25, 2006, 07:51:14 pm »

  Hi  Maren,I know that it feels like the worst thing ever but you will be ok.It is hard not to think about the what ifs but things will unfold how they are meant to and your health is the most important!Having something/someone to focus your energy on will help you get through this and they will be there after your surgery as well.
  I think that everyone's surgery experiences are different so it's hard to say how you will be affected.I know that I didn't feel like myself for the first month and now,two months post op I still don't feel quite altogether "there" I think now it has shifted more from the physical changes to coping mentally to the changes my body has gone through and again I think that everyone has different experiences.
  Hope things go well on wednesday,as Desilu said : be honest with them.A positive mindset goes a long way in the time leading up to surgery. Take care,Jacobs
 
Translab April 24,2006 3.5x2.5cm
Sunnybrook Hospital,Toronto.Dr.Chen&Dr.Perusmen
Left side facial paralysis,gold weight in eyelid &"deaf on the left"
now I'm a true canadian...EH?

Battyp

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Re: i am so nervous, i am so nervous, i am so nervous!
« Reply #3 on: June 25, 2006, 08:23:24 pm »
Maren I agree with Desilu and Jacobs!  Be honest with your future employer.  They will either make the concessions needed and hire you or something better will come along! 

Everyone's post surgical experience is different but you must give yourself time to heal!  I was told if all went according to plan I could conceivably be back to work in 3 to 6 weeks.  Things did not go according to plan and I'm still out of work and will be for another 6 mos.  So it's really hard to predict the future and outcomes. 

Keep us posted on your appointment.  You sound like someone who is high energy!  That will go along way in your recovery process :o)  Best of Luck to you...or do we say "break a leg?"

chelsmom

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Re: i am so nervous, i am so nervous, i am so nervous!
« Reply #4 on: June 25, 2006, 10:05:23 pm »
Hello... I'm sure you are nervous.  It's hard doing the waiting game.  My daughter, Chelsea, just went through the first part of and unexpected 2 part surgery to remove her 4.5cm AN.  She had the surgery last Sunday and is still in the ICU.  They are just keeping a really close eye on her which makes me feel good.  The next part of her surgery is on 6/30/06.  As everyone has said, you along with my daughter and some of the others here have youth on your side. The doctors are pleased with here progress.  I would make sure you talk to the Doctors about the posibility of a 2 part surgery.  Chris (chrissmom) is also going through the same thing.  All large tumors.  I know you'll do great. Our prayers and thoughts are with you.               
Chelsmom.

Jim Scott

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Re: i am so nervous, i am so nervous, i am so nervous!
« Reply #5 on: June 27, 2006, 03:28:07 pm »
superrmaren:

Hi!

AN - while serious - is far from the horror some seem to think.   It's not malignant and it's operable, all positive aspects you should focus on.  It can be removed -and your life can go on, if you let it.

I'm 63 and following a positive MRI diagnosis for AN on May 4th, I had a 4.5cm AN tumor removed on June 7th, 2006. To put it mildly: all went well.  I  I was out of the hospital within 5 days and after 3 weeks, my overall recovery is progressing rapidly - and smoothly.  I see my surgeon for a follow-up visit in 3 weeks and I expect to be given the O.K. to resume most normal activities , as well as permission to drive, again.  I can't wait!

If you are in good general health, as I was/am, have a competent surgeon and a positive attitude, you'll be fine.

Jim
4.5 cm AN diagnosed 5/06.  Retrosigmoid surgery 6/06.  Follow-up FSR completed 10/06.  Tumor shrinkage & necrosis noted on last MRI.  Life is good. 

Life is not the way it's supposed to be. It's the way it is.  The way we cope with it is what makes the difference.

Sefra22

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Re: i am so nervous, i am so nervous, i am so nervous!
« Reply #6 on: June 27, 2006, 04:04:47 pm »
Hi  supermarren,
I can totally relate. I don't meet with a surgeon until next week. I had to tell my boss yesterday that I may be out for a while if I need surgery...and I cried! I was so embarrased :'( He was very supportive, but I did not intend to be so emotional. I think that not knowing when/if I need surgery is the worst part. Maybe once we have a plan we will feel better.  ;) I hope!
Lisa from Portland, Maine age 46
Diagnosed June 2006
15mm X 17mm AN right side 80% hearing loss
GK March 14,2007 Dr. Noren, Providence RI
1 Year follow-up MRI shows "slight shrinkage".
2 Year follow-up MRI shows "No Change".
3 Year follow-up MRI "stable".
BAHA surgery 4-22-09 BP100 Sept. 2009