ANA Discussion Forum
General Category => AN Issues => Topic started by: Jwh on January 17, 2009, 10:02:18 am
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Help! I'm nine days away from my scheduled Translab surgery and I have absolutely no tolerance for ANYTHING! Every little thing is making me nuts and want to go off the deep end. The kids crying, normal everyday demands is sooo difficult for me. I just want to be left alone with my own thoughts. Yikes, this is hard.
>:(
On top of it all, both of my kids have full blown colds!!! I'm petrified that I'll get sick now and will have to postpone the surgery. This happened to me the first time and I broke down in tears!
Need some support....
Jen
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Hi Jen,
I know how nerve wracking things can get when you are this close to surgery and I would guess the second time around is even worse, especially when everyone around you is sick. My husband and kids were all sick right before my BAHA surgery (not quite as important as yours but I was still afraid I would have to put it off and really didn't want to). The only advice I can give you is to take a deep breath when you feel yourself starting to come unglued and take some alone time -- even ten minutes will help if that's all you can get sometimes. Try doing relaxation exercises. One that's always helped me to to concentrate on relaxing each part of my body starting with my feet and working up to my head. It's not that easy the first few times you try it, but it does get easier and works better each time you do it. To try to ward off a coldl, take a multivitamin every day and vitamin C and get as much rest as you can. Try not to stress out too much -- easier said than done I know, but stress weakens the immune system.
Best wishes,
Wendy
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Jen,
I needed anti anxiety meds to get me through the final stretch before surgery. I took Xanax and it worked wonders. Hang in there, soon it will be over.
Best,
M
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Maybe try to find something to look forward to in the intervening days - a night out with friends, or an hour at a spa...whatever works for you. Also, if you find that niggling feeling in your throat that signals a cold is on it's way, I heartily recommend Zicam (I think that's the spelling), I have thus far warded off 3 colds in the past year. There are tablets for under your tongue, but I think they taste nasty, so I used the nasal gel swabs this last time. Also, clean obsessively with antibacterial and viral wipes, if possible. Especially important are faucets, light switches, door knobs, telephones, and KEYBOARDS!
Wishing you peace,
Tamara
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Jen,
You are in a tough stretch! Believe me, the day will arrive!! I spent the month waiting for my surgery getting healthy. I felt that getting my heart as strong as possible could only help. So I walked alot (it was fall, and nice weather I will add). It was calming, and healthy. It might even help you fend off any cold germs!! (are the kids too sick to join you for a nice walk?)
I hope you can find some time for yourself!! I spent a lot of time inhaling and exhaling when my patience was thin.
Hang in there!!
Samantha
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Hi, everyone thank you for taking the time and writing me back. For the first time since my rediagnosis, I broke down in tears today. I just feel an overwhelming burden right about now. My doctor did prescribe some Kolopin for me which has been helping. I have my pre-op on Tuesday and I wish they would tell me that they could fit me in next week. Just want it over with now :(
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Jen:
I'm sorry you have to deal with so much stress at this critical point. All the really good advice has been given; disinfect, take Zicam if needed and definitely try to take some 'me-time' as you move toward your surgery. This is the time for a spouse or other family member or friends to help out, even though you haven't yet had the surgery. I would ask. Going into surgery stressed and tense can't be good. Don't let that happen. Your kids need a mom that is functioning, not a shrill, impatient woman who is scary to be around. That really isn't you, of course, but the stress of your upcoming surgery seems to be making you that way. You have to try to balance things a bit and that probably means some time for yourself. It's hard to hold a positive attitude when you're totally distracted by the demands of motherhood. I hope and will pray that you can find some peace and solace in the next few days.
Jim
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Ah, Jen, I'm sending you a great big hug. Wish I could snap my fingers and have it all be over and behind you. You can always call me if you just want to vent.
Debbi
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The most difficult part of this journey is the need to control every situation. However, in my case the more I tried to deal with kids and sickness the more anxious I got. Another AN person who had been through the surgery said to stop / pray / and to turn over the situation to GOD. I did and everytime that I got scared I would do this. Stay strong and before you know it it will be a week later and on the mend. We will be thinking of you and thank you so much for sharing.
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The most difficult part of this journey is the need to control every situation.
I absolutely agree with Johnny. Release control, Jen!
Jan (a certified control freak)
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The most difficult part of this journey is the need to control every situation.
I absolutely agree with Johnny. Release control, Jen!
Yup. Put it on autopilot. Sit back and let it unfold. If you get a cold, well then that happens. It won't be long now.
Steve
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The most difficult part of this journey is the need to control every situation. However, in my case the more I tried to deal with kids and sickness the more anxious I got. Another AN person who had been through the surgery said to stop / pray / and to turn over the situation to GOD. I did and everytime that I got scared I would do this. Stay strong and before you know it it will be a week later and on the mend. We will be thinking of you and thank you so much for sharing.
Very good advice! I need to let things happen as they come ( : I've been busy cleaning, cleaning and more cleaning my house. It's never looked so good. Doing my best to keep busy and productive.
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Jen, those days before surgery were harder than the days after!!! Hang in there. I too had a very clean house, kind of like the nesting thing when you're about to give birth. I also made sure bills were paid and checks were written for the next pay day. I had lists of all kinds of things. Control what I could!
My doc also said I could have anti-anxiety meds. You might want to consider them. As for the kids colds, wash your hands constantly, take your vitamin C and zinc, and get plenty of rest. I had my preop labs done a week before surgery. I had a urinary infection show up. No symptoms, just showed in the labs. I had to take antibiotics and get tested again in the days before surgery. Call your doc for advice.
The day before surgery I took my then 1 yo dd to the zoo. I was so dizzy I could hardly walk and we stayed only a couple hours and I was exhausted but I didn't regret it all.
This will be behind you soon, stay strong and vent to us when you need to, even if it's 20x a day. :)
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Jen, those days before surgery were harder than the days after!!! Hang in there. I too had a very clean house, kind of like the nesting thing when you're about to give birth. I also made sure bills were paid and checks were written for the next pay day. I had lists of all kinds of things. Control what I could!
My doc also said I could have anti-anxiety meds. You might want to consider them. As for the kids colds, wash your hands constantly, take your vitamin C and zinc, and get plenty of rest. I had my preop labs done a week before surgery. I had a urinary infection show up. No symptoms, just showed in the labs. I had to take antibiotics and get tested again in the days before surgery. Call your doc for advice.
The day before surgery I took my then 1 yo dd to the zoo. I was so dizzy I could hardly walk and we stayed only a couple hours and I was exhausted but I didn't regret it all.
This will be behind you soon, stay strong and vent to us when you need to, even if it's 20x a day. :)
I could've written this post! I feel like I'm nesting ( : Now I feel a cold coming on ohhhh no!!! Is it for real or is it my imagination! Everyone is sick in my house - boo whoooo. I'm soooo scared I'm getting sick that can't happen! It would make me crazy to reschedule ) :
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Jen,
I'll make the generous offer that I made to Cheri prior to her surgery (she never did take me up on the offer) - if cleaning makes you feel better, I've got plenty to keep you busy - you'll feel great!! :D
Lori
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Yeah, my house was pretty clean as well, but I took particular pride in my sofa cushions. They were absolutely showroom quality--no creases, perfectly placed. It's so funny to think of it now, and you should see them now; even funnier! As a fellow-control freak I agree that you just need to let it all go. Put your faith in God or whatever higher power and your trust in your doctors. Be calm and let it all just happen.
Thinking of you,
Marci
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Hi Jen,
Thinking back on it, I also wanted the house in perfect condition, the fridge and fully stocked and all the laundry and ironing done. It just made me feel better knowing I had taken care of my familyas much as I could before I went into the hospital. I knew it would make me feel better to come home to a clean house and a lot less like I had to do "my share" when I came home. If cleaning makes you feel better it's certainly a great outlet for teh excess energy brought on by stress, , but try to do some fun things too. Go see a movie, go out with friends, etc. I got together with so many friends the week before my surgery I was almost (but not quite) able to put the surgery totally out of my mind.
Wendy
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Before surgery one, You wouldn't believe all I had done to my house. Old bills thrown away,the linen closet done to perfection, all done in case I never made it. Surgeries 2 thru 4 had a rather clean house and that was it as knew I was going to make it. The first one in 2001 was waiting from August to Nov with no stories on the previous type forum of any good outcomes. I was a basket case about how life would be afterwards. I feel very grateful I have done fairly well in spite of NF2 making its surprising appearance. I could be much worse off even with some annoying issues.
Cheryl R
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Awe ((((HUGS)))) sweetie! Could I have written your post - - I was given two weeks notice for surgery and thank goodness it was not longer - I was a complete basket case and worked up until 2 days before surgery. I too have young kids and I was so nervous - I did not have anything for the anxiety - thusly I kept working - but I cried at the drop of a hat - my work, friends and family were absolutely wonderful and they totally understood the nervousness I felt - - and even though I also knew this surgery was a very safe procedure I also couldn't help with the 'what-ifs' and that certainnly did not help either - - I think I lost 5 lbs before surgery from the nervous stomach ..... but the day came and I was SOOOOO' calm - and so relieved to know that this 'thing' that I had known about for over a year in my head was FINALLY coming out!
What you are feeling is very normal and you will get through it - just try to keep busy - and a nice glass of Shiraz helps too! :)
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Glad I am still in the waiting phase. The decision is hard enough. I simply cannot imagine the wait. If and when I walk this post, I will guarantee I will post a very very similar post.
Can you watch a huge series of movies - for hours and hours on end???? I have always wanted to watch the whole Lord of the Rings or maybe Harry Potter, all right in a row.
Good luck.
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hang in there!!! you are almost there!!! I remember i was a wreck too - a control wreck that is, i was busy scheduling, writing down list of things to do, organizing, cleaning, getting ready for my surgery, getting ready for my post surgery, getting ready for whatever happens after my surgery. it helped to calm me down, so do whatever feels right to you and to get you to that comfort zone. On the way there, don't forget to breath, smell the roses, find your good karma hat and put it on, and just go with the flow. Good luck!!!
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Hey there...sounds like you have gotten some good advice :) I've been were you are now. My children at the time were young and yes they really got on my nerves. You are normal.....I to went crazy with the house, I scrubbed my stove which had been neglected and my sister from Ark. came to stay with me so she helped a lot on keeping my mind off of the surgery. Just hang in there and pray, pray, pray...God is good.
Blessings,
Deblyvers
From Ky