ANA Discussion Forum
Archive => Archives => Topic started by: alibauer on August 01, 2005, 03:06:00 pm
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Hi All,
When I was diagnosed with this jerk of a tumor a week ago, I thought I was asymptomatic and was shocked I could have something like this. My ENT did not go over all possible symptoms with me and didn't even mention dizziness. When I read on multiple reputable sites that dizziness is a symptom, I was floored.
For at least a couple of years I've suffered from spells of weakness, dizziness and even faintness (I can avoid actually fainting, thank God). Sometimes these are accompanied by nausea. Out of nowhere, I will just feel awful and frail (for lack of a more accurate term). I always just assumed I had slight blood sugar issues. My grandmother has diabetes and I thought I was a little hypo-glycemic or something. I would definitely say in the past year or so the symptoms have gotten worse - longer duration and more frequent.
My question is this - when this tumor causes dizziness, is it constant or does it come and go like mine, at least at first?
Thanks in advance for any feedback!
Ali
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Hi Ali
To answer your question about dizziness, I would say it depends upon the person and their tumor size and location. I think at first the 'tendency' may be for recurrant dizziness and not chronic.
There are no 'definitives' of symptoms among AN sufferers, only generalities, however.
Hold tight. You'll get through this!
Russ
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Wow. Just as I suspected. Thanks a bunch for the confirmation. Just what I was looking for.
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hi! dizziness was my only symptom. i had 2 very dizzy spells where i thought i was in an earthquake. really..the world moved and i fell! we actually had an earthquake a week or so ago and my friend thought she had a brain tumor because of my episodes! :) after i had my mri and was dx'd w/ my AN, i noticed the dizziness more and more. i'm sure that i was dizzy previously, but blamed it on the same things you did. my mom is type II diabetic and so i thought i was having blood sugar problems or low bp or something. it all made sense after my diagnosis.
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dizziness is my worse symptom .. its constant .. like I'm drunk ... good thing I had lots of practice in college ;D , my surgery is next week at house!
Joe
from Shelton,CT
3.9 cm AN
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Wow, good luck Joef, and congrats at getting the sucker removed!
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Hi Ali - a few years before my tumor was diagnosed, I seemed to be very accident proned or what some might call a klutz(sp?). My husband and kids would constantly say "Oh God, not again!" as I always seemed to be hurting myself. I would bump into walls, (still have trouble with one in particular, my arm has a constant bruise on it) anyway, in retropsect I would most definetly say that dizziness/balance issues were my first symptoms. They were periodic, thank goodness, otherwise I would have been in a full body cast. At times my dizziness felt like I was experiencing an earthquake, sometimes the room looked like it was shaking. I did experience alot of nausea, but thought it was indigestion. I am 7 years post op and still can't walk a straight line.
I hate to bring up a sore subject, but has your friend called?
Joe - LOL College prepared us in more ways than we imagined! Good luck next week and keep us posted.
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funny joe! i said the same thing...only after my surgery. i felt like i was in some sort of spirit world with all the meds i was on. :)
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Hi Matti,
I can't imagine staying dizzy forever! That must be awful; I'm so sorry. My dizziness never feels like an earthquake, though. It's more like I feel really weak all of a sudden and lightheaded. I don't fall down. Come to think of it, I'd definitely call it severe light-headedness and nausea sonner than dizziness, though I do feel unsteady on my feet.
On the subject of my "friend". No, she hasn't called. I am angry with her, but it's starting to give way to severe disappointment. I feel so absolutely let down. The anger comes when I think of all the times that I sat for 2 hours at a time on the phone with her just listening to her crying about her financial troubles and her boyfriend that dumped her at the worst possible time. She would literally dump all her feelings in my lap night after night, but I didn't mind because that's what friends are for. This went on fairly regularly for weeks and months and caused me to neglect my husband on countless weekends. He complained and I told him that it was my responsibility because she was my friend. I got it backwards. I was her friend. Not sure anymore if she was ever mine.
I blocked her on AOL IM, which I have to be on while I'm at work because my office uses it as a kind of communication. She is on it at work for fun. Today was the second day that, as far as she could tell, I wasn't at work. Phone hasn't rang yet. I didn't do it as an experiment to see if she'd call - I am not that desperate and part of me doesn't even want to hear from her because she's not my favorite right now. I just didn't want to keep giving her that easy way to check in and see how I was doing, while she spends all of her phone time on the guy she's dating.
Did I mention that this is my oldest friend that I met when I was 11? 8 full days since my diagnosis and she has yet to call.
Ali
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ali, i am sorry about what's happening with you and your oldest friend. i guess just keep in mind that it's probably scary for her too. i always said, over and over, that i would much rather be me and having surgery then be my family or my friends and not have any control. not that i'm making excuses for her not calling you, cause that's not cool. have you tried calling her and telling her how you feel? like "hi friend, i'm really lost and confused and i don't understand why you haven't called. i could really use a hug from my oldest friend about now" you never know...she might be on some other website wondering why you haven't called after being diagnosed w/ a brain tumor.
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One of my first noticeable symptoms was dizziness. Whenever I moved my head quickly or when I checked my blind spot while driving, my whole world would spin around. That was why I went to the doctor. He thought I had an inner ear infection. (He thought that for about 6 months.) I had no sign of hearing loss, though. I also would get strange heart rhythyms, where I would get quite faint. My heart would beat a few beats, then skip a beat.  Come to find out, my tumor was severely compressing my brainstem!ÂÂ
Honestly, I believe that I had an easier time adjusting to the loss of my balance nerve after surgery. I feel my "good" side had already learned to compensate.
Your tumor is probably already putting pressure on your balance nerve. I was prescribed valium before surgery for the dizziness. That seemed to help. You will get through this. I know it's hard to imagine that now.... It's been 2 1/2 years since my surgery and I'm doing very well. I have a few issues, but have found ways to help ease my symptoms. Take care, Angela
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One of my first noticeable symptoms was dizziness. Whenever I moved my head quickly or when I checked my blind spot while driving, my whole world would spin around.ÂÂ
Hey that sounds like me!! .. I try to turn my head slowly to see the traffic .. I'm still driving 40 miles to work!!, turns at 80mph feel like I'm pulling 3 g's . (I am driving slower now :( ) The worse part about being dizzy all day is fatigue .. I think my body trying to compensate for the balance issues wipes me out by the end of the day ...
Joe
from Shelton,CT
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have you tried calling her and telling her how you feel? like "hi friend, i'm really lost and confused and i don't understand why you haven't called. i could really use a hug from my oldest friend about now" you never know...she might be on some other website wondering why you haven't called after being diagnosed w/ a brain tumor.
Kristin, if she is on a website wondering why I haven't called her since I was diagnosed, I hope there are people there to set her straight. That is, to tell her what a self-centered, selfish and inconsiderate fool she is being. Were I in the same place that she is and suddenly realized we hadn't spoken since her diagnosis, I would assume her not having called meant she was probably rightfully hurt that I hadn't called to check in on her. It's not that I'm not willing to call her. I'm not going to call her first though. If she doesn't offer her ear then I'm not going to ask for it. I won't call someone and dump my problems in their lap when it's obvious they don't care to hear them and I'm not going to throw her a free opportunity to be a better friend either. She's going to have to motivate herself to do that. As far as I'm concerned if she keeps this up than I'll be fortunate to know that she is actually not the friend I thought she was and alter her place in my life accordingly.
I'm the one that's going through something here. If it is hard for her and this is her way of expressing it, then she can go to Hell. I'm sorry that it's tough and I don't want my problem to cause too much stress for anyone but that's just the way it goes. Life is hard and when someone you love is going through something this unbelievably stressful and potentially life altering you swallow your stupid fear or awkward feelings and you make yourself available to them.
Here is the funniest part - I don't even need half the hand holding that she needed and got from me when her boyfriend broke up with her. How ironic is that? I remember thinking it was a bit absurd how much crying and whining and constant feeling sorry for herself she did but figured we each handle disappointment and heartache in different ways. I seriously just want to talk to her about it enough to keep her posted on my doctor's appointments and have her agree with me that the situation throughly sucks. Then I wanna talk about other stuff, like her new boyfriend and regular life!
Did I mention that she also kept me on the phone regularly whining for extremely long times when she fell and broke her arm? That was a TRAGEDY. HOW could something that AWFUL happen to HER? The POOR THING! Wow, writing about this has made me realize that she is a real mope and a whiner. Everything that goes wrong in her life is an absolutely unprecedented tragic event that requires all kinds of band-aids and attention. And I must be the biggest doormat on the planet! I actually sent her flowers on Valentine's Day because her boyfriend had just dumped her and I wanted to cheer her up. I'm a total loser.
Also, since her life got back together, she calls me a lot less in general. In fact, the last time was when some internet date guy abruptly stopped talking to her. WHAAA WHAAA WHAAA! But when I say I'd rather not meet her new boyfriend the day after my CT Scan reading and only 5 days after my MRI tumor diagnosis because my husband and I would rather be alone since we're under so much stress...her response? "That sucks". That was via AOL IM. There was a hint that I was feeling down and she never even asked how I was feeling or if I wanted to talk about it. She was too busy being disappointed because her next date wasn't going to be a double with us!
Man, I'm really starting to dislike this girl. My husband has noticed some of these things about her for months and has always thought she was not the best person. She's proving him right.
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Hi Ali - Does your friend have a twin? As I had stated in an earlier post, I HAD a best friend like her. When I read your post it is as if you are writing about the relationship between me and my friend. Wierd!!! I too put my life on hold all the time, my family came second, she came first. Some nights I was not able to get dinner on the table, because she was having a major crisis (broken garage door, fighting with her sister, mailman put the wrong mail in her box, pimples , someone cut her off while she was driving and list goes on and on. I was trying to be a good friend by ALWAYS being there for her, because thats what friends do, but was she there for me - NO. I stayed in that relationship for almost 10 years and hung on until I helped her through her hysterectomy.
So this is the way I look at it. If she can't handle her own problems, how can she help me through mine. Maybe your friend is scared? Since you have always been the strong support system in the relationship, she may not be able to fill that role, because her role has always been the needy one. Sort of like a parent/child relationship. She may not know how to step up to the plate and take charge. It's all so sad and I am sorry this is happening to you Ali.
matti
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Matti,
Maybe we are two peas in a pod - doormats. I am quite forgiving and in general, giving. The line has to be drawn somewhere though. This is it in her case. Scared? Maybe, but I would not be surprised if she almost never thinks of it. Too busy with her life, now that it's going a lot better. In fact, that would be my bet. Unable to take the strong friend role? If that's the case then it's no excuse. She's an adult, not a child.
Oh well. The more it goes on, the less I care. My care for her is seriously draining. When she calls, and I know she will eventually, I will tell her how I feel. It will change everything between us, I'm sure. I don't care anymore.
Ali
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Ali - LOL! I guess that is why my nickname is matti, - short for doormat.
have a great day!
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Joe . . . Good luck next week! :D
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i am SO sorry. i wish i wouldn't have said anything. i hope that you'll find the support you are needing, here and at home. please understand that i was just trying to find something hopefull in a crappy situation.
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Hey Krisitin,
Oh please don't apologize. I'm sorry if my response made you feel badly. That wasn't my intention and I knew you were trying to urge a look on the bright side. I absolutely appreciate that. No worries at all.
The one I'm pissed at is my so-called friend. I think you are awesome to try to find the hopeful glimmer. I just know her and I don't think it's there.
Oh well. I have my husband family, better friends and the few co-workers that know (before surgery I'm keeping things on a need to know basis) for support. Everyone has been great and I'm doing well. I actually feel fortunate to find this out about her.
Ali
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Joe . . . Good luck next week! :D
Thanks!! at this point I'm looking forward to it 8) I wont be around here for a couple of weeks (I hear that the guest center at St. Vincent has a pc for guests).. as I work up to things, I'll logon and tell my story...
Joe
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Ali, I have read yourposts about your friend not calling you. Well funny thing my BEST friend since kindergarden didnt call me after I had my surgery for over 7 weeks. Didn't even know if I made it through the operation alright. Then when she finally called I didn't want to talk to her. So my mom did. It took me a long time to forgive her and to this day our friendship is not the same. Also I had a lot of people that I was close to that till this day NEVER called me. It is so amazing to see who your true friends are. The funniest thing of all is that some of the closest people I knew didnt call me but people that heard about me from high school that I havent heard from in 20 years sent flowers and called me. Go figure. I heard that sometimes peolpe cant handle things. My best friend said to me that she didn't want to call , she was afraid to. Didn't know what to say to me. But I still can't understand. I am the type of person that would be at my friends bedside through it all. So that is why it is so hard to understand. Oh and better yet my brotherinlaw (the only one I have and was very close to) has yet to visit me or call me. My husband said he called him 2 times when I was in the hospital. @ weeks in and he never visited me. So sadly I decided it hurt too bad to keep thinking about why he never visited or called. I finally decided I no longer have a brother in law. I am very hurt by him and I need to move on with my life. So Ali your not alone out there.. Positive thinking you need that right now... Goldineye :)
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Hey Goldin,
Wow, I'm so sorry you had to go through the same thing to the nth degree! Thanks for sharing.
I'm with you on what to do to people that offer no support and show no caring. I plan to cut her out of my life if she keeps this up. When she calls (I still think she will because I think she's not called because she is clueless and self-centered, not because she is afraid or dealing badly), I plan on having a long talk about exactly how let down I feel and why. Hopefully that will fix the problem. I have to say though, right now I am so unbelievably disgusted with her that I'm almost hoping she never calls.
Ali
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actually now that i think of it..i got an email from my GRANDMOTHER before my surgery saying she was going to call but didn't know what to say. not that we're extremely close...but my GRANDMA?!? :)
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??? Wow. There are not words. ???
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She called today. Not quite sure what to do about that. I was still asleep and she left a message saying that she's been worried but things have been "crazy at work". She is home from work an hour and a half before I am. This is the same schedule I was keeping when I was listening to her whine about her life night after night. It's a ridiculous excuse.
I want to tell her how disappointed in her I am, but I'm uncomfortable about calling back to confront her. If she calls again, I'll tell her. Maybe this is immature. I'm perfectly willing to be honest about my feelings, but I'm not willing to call. It's so complicated. I don't know why. Probably because the damage is done.