ANA Discussion Forum
General Category => Hearing Issues => Topic started by: Boppie on September 11, 2007, 09:56:22 pm
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I am becoming better and better at lip reading. So, occasionally, I go without my hearing aid. But I always wear a small ear shaped charm on my good ear side. After many months of wearing the one earring, friends and family are beginning to look for it. My husband told me the earring helps him remember. People walk around to get around on my good side to talk to me! If I go out without this earring people ask where it is.
Maybe in ten years folks will even know what the letters SSD mean! ;D
It should really be SSDD meaning Single Side Direction Deaf :-\
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I have felt like making a sign and stick to my self with an arrow pointing at good ear a time or two...
at our PTO officer meeting this morning everyone let me pick my seat so that I would be positoned
to hear better... what I find funny is my kids or husband whispering stuff in my deaf ear if I am on
the phone :D ... you would think they would get it by now
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Hello, my name is Heidi and I am brand new to the forum. I have read many of the posts and find them extremely interesting and most relevant to my situation. It is so good to know I am not alone in this AN thing.
I just have to laugh that sometimes my family and friends do not remember which is my hearing ear and that I am deaf on my "bad side". I love it when my husband comes up behind me to whisper something! Couldn't hear whispers before my surgery, certainly can't hear them now!!
Thank you to all who post their experiences. So comforting!!
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Boppie,
Great idea on the ear ring on one side. I'm still amazed when my my family members don't remember that I can't hear on one side. Maybe I could try the football-personality thing and wear a 4 carat diamond in one ear :)
Regards,
Rob
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I have always enjoyed getting silly and over the top to grab attention. How about wearing a hat with one of those springy flowers sprouting out on the deaf side. Tell your family you are gonna wear the stupid thing until they remember.
I made a strong point one time this week. I called my bad side "my dead side". My friend tried to correct the word, but I replied that's what it is, 'Dead'. This sounds a little profane, but I makes my point... the hearing there is NEVER going to grow back.
Rob, I like your 'Carpe Grog'.
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Not much irritates me more than my family trying to talk to me while I am on the phone!!!!! They know I can't hear! Most of my family have learned to position themselves so I can hear them when we are out. One daughter says even when she is shopping with someone else she puts them on her right side or it drives her crazy.
However, people at church are always trying to whisper something in my right ear. My new brother-in-law came and sat by me on my AN side in church and told me something??? I just smiled. He told my sister, I told Lynn I am really feeling bad and she just nodded and smiled! Oh well....
Enjoy the rest of your week ALL,
Lynn
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Lynn I totally understand where you are coming from. In church if someone sits next to your deaf side you have to totally turn your body to hear anything or just sit and smile like you know what people are saying. I am finding that I am not as interested in hearing detailed conversations anymore. It is a bigger deal than people realize. The one that bugs me the most is when I am emptying my grocery cart and my back is towards the bag boy and he is constantly asking, "do you want paper or plastic?" I can't hear anything they say but faint words. Of course I know what they are saying but it just bugs the stew out of me and I will turn and sometimes say I am deaf I am sorry I can't hear you, then the other day I asked, does anyone ever request paper? Here in Florida most people use plastic and recycle. I suggested to them they put a sign up and say we "assume you will use plastic unless you tell us otherwise!" I guess I am getting snippy about this irritating disability....
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I forgot the other day and tried to answer the phone with my bad ear. I thought my cell phone was bouncing service and then remembered . . . It has 11 months ago I had surgery so you think it would be second nature by now. :P
I would like to find a little more attractive pin. Maybe I'll get my daughter to play with polymer clay and come up with something. I wish there was a universal attractive pin for "hearing courtesy" like the pink ribbon for breast cancer awareness. That way anybody with hearing issues could wear it without having to ask people to speak louder or clearer after initial contact.
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RE Pins
I ordered 2 of these and wear then everyday. One on my coat and the other on my clothing.
AN10: Pin for Single-Sided Deafness
Designed to be worn on the side of your non-hearing ear.
Helps direct the speaker to your hearing ear.
The pin is approximately 1 ¾" wide by 2 ¾" high.
https://secure.baxinternet.com/~anausa/for_sale.html
I love the hat with the flower idea
Have any of you ever read
Daisy-Head Mayzie by Dr Seuss
http://www.amazon.com/Daisy-Head-Mayzie-Classic-Seuss-Dr/dp/0679867120/ref=pd_bbs_2/104-6575588-4925539?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1194056474&sr=8-2
I have to crack up… here I am 10 weeks since surgery and SSD and I TOO picked up the phone with the wrong ear today. LOL Not only does my family forget what side I am deaf on … but so did I…
We got to keep laughing to stay sane...
Keep moving forward.
4
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I share everyone's frustration with SSD. I'm 6 months post op (had perfect hearing in my affected ear before the surgery) and my husband still yells at me from other rooms. This week I just told him if you have something that you want me to hear you're going to have to tell me face to face. In the past I've been running all over the place asking him what he said, but now I have developed either Lupus or Rheumatoid arthritis and my joints have been extremely painful and I don't feel like running around all over the house.
I also still put the phone to my deaf ear (did it twice just this week).
Linda in WV
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So glad it's not just MY family that can't remember which side is deaf! After 8 years!!!
Most of the time, friends are better at remembering and getting on my good side when out walking than family members are. Still, I always dance a lot of the "one-ear do-si-do." :)
I also hate it when family members try to talk to me when I'm on the phone. They just can't seem to comprehend that I can't hear them!
Even worse is when my husband is in the kitchen, water is running, fan is on, he's trying to say something on my bad side. I say "I can't hear you." So he goes around to my other side and starts SHOUTING toward my perfectly good ear! Aaargh!!
Wasn't there some (proposed or actual) pin or earring that says "Out of order; please use other ear"? :)
In restaurants, I always insist on picking my spot at the table, even making someone move when necessary. I always choose the end seat of a square table so that everyone is on my good side except the person directly across from me. Round tables are no fun. I end up more or less subconsciously ignoring the person on my left, because it's just so much darn effort to carry on a conversation with them.
I can't relate to accidentally putting the phone on the wrong ear. I NEVER do that, and don't think I ever did from day one of my hearing loss. It's like my body knows instinctively that the phone goes on the right ear.
Nancy T.
(no AN, but deaf in left ear; BAHA-hopeful)
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SSD experiences are anywhere from funny to frustrating, and more often, the latter. The one's posted here are things we can all relate to. However, I'm not wearing an earring or pin! ;)
My wife is very astute about walking on my 'hearing' side and generally adjusting to the fact that I am deaf on one side (after 30+ years together when I heard just fine on either side). Even so, she occasionally makes the mistake of trying to talk to me when I'm on the phone or talking to me from two rooms away. I simply remind her "I can't hear you" and she quickly comes closer or writes down her comment if I'm on the phone. Others forget and I simply adjust by asking them to repeat what they said or moving to a position where they're on my 'good' (hearing) side. At church or in a large gathering, I often tell the person on my deaf side that I'm deaf in that ear and if they speak to me I probably won't hear them. I ask them to tap me on the arm to get my attention and I'll turn my 'good ear' to them so we can converse. No one objects. In fact, most folks (needlessly) apologize for not knowing (or remembering) that I'm deaf on my left side.
I'm resigned to the fact that I'm going to miss some conversation, occasionally. That is an immutable fact of SSD. I can live with it. I have to.
Jim
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We live out in the sticks and have been having problems with phone lately...alot
of static and clicking... the other day my husband was trying to make a call... I was
washing dishes and he had told me the phone didn't sound right... I asked what did it
sound like... he came up behind me and put phone to deaf ear... I told him it sounded
clear to me ...
I turned to watch him return to desk listening to phone and frowning ...he hung it up
and said it still sounded bad to him...I guess I could have told him I heard clear line simply
because I heard nothing ... but thought naaaaaaaaaaaaa... gotta get giggles in when I can :)
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I just ordered the "Deaf Right" pin from the ANA - I didn't realize it was going to be so big!! Guess I could have read the dimensions on the website, but, of course, I didn't. Does anyone know if there is a smaller version of the pin available anywhere? I'm not a big person to begin with, and that thing would look like I had a billboard pinned to my clothes. I realize the idea is for people to see it, I just don't think they need to see it from across town! Any suggestions?
I do have my family pretty well trained to talk to me on the side with the watch. That works well for people who know me, but I'm having more of a problem when I'm out and about, so the watch thing doesn't work for that.
Thanks.
Lori
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I ordered two of these pins a few weeks ago. It is suppposed to measure 1½" high. I sure hope it isn't bigger!
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Boppie,
I just measured my "deaf left" pin ... 2 3/4 inches. I bought 2. One for my coat and one for the out-fit-of-the-day...
Cheers,
4
(fashion queen LOL :D ;) )
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You are right 4, My pins arrived today. The taller measurement is 2¾" the horizontal is 1¾". At least these can't be missed.
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Well, I suppose if the fashion queen says it's okay... maybe we can start our own fashion trend. All of the runway models will be wishing they were deaf on one side...
;D
Lori
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:D LOL
4
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I have worn a small pierced earring with an ear charm on it for my good ear. Only my best friends and family respond to it.
Today at a large meeting someone noticed my pin. The size actually makes an immediate point. At least someone mentioned it, maybe coveted it. ;D
Another person took a place on my good side to have a long conversation after the meeting.
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See some brilliant designer in the ANA knew what they were doing when they created this...
;)
4
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Hmmm... it's coming to me now... I'm seeing a pin to match each outfit - something with sparkle.... I think i can make my first million... or at least a couple of bucks. I think I have a limited market. Gotta work on that.
I guess in the meantime, I'll have to wear my billboard. At least it will take the attention away from my droopy lip and maybe no one will notice I'm winking at them. And at least if I accidently ignore someone and they say "what are you - deaf?" I can point to my pin and say "what are you - blind?".
;) Lori
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Lori,
LOL :D ... you are too funny!
4
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We live out in the sticks and have been having problems with phone lately...alot
of static and clicking... the other day my husband was trying to make a call... I was
washing dishes and he had told me the phone didn't sound right... I asked what did it
sound like... he came up behind me and put phone to deaf ear... I told him it sounded
clear to me ...
I turned to watch him return to desk listening to phone and frowning ...he hung it up
and said it still sounded bad to him...I guess I could have told him I heard clear line simply
because I heard nothing ... but thought naaaaaaaaaaaaa... gotta get giggles in when I can :)
You crack me up... how funny and how true. Depending on how tired I am - I can be very patient or very frustrated with others talking on my deaf side.... Try keeping track of who is reading correctly in a classroom when you have your kids reading in partners.... all at the same time . No problem before (they sit all around the room with spaces between) but now that I can't filter out background noise and deal with tinnitus too... I watch to see that their finger is under the words in the same place... and rely on the fact that 2nd graders love to tattle on each other if their partner is not doing what they are supposed to :D .
This first school year as SSD is a challenging one for me in the classroom and so far so good. Next wednesday is 1/3 of the way through the year and I am planning to celebrate reaching this point..... there was a time I didn't think I could continue teaching.
As far as keeping kids on my hearing side... I put my school ID badge on my shirt on the good ear side and tell my kids (and adults) if they talk on that side of me.... they will always be on the right side.
Margaret
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I give you a lot of credit for being able to handle a classroom full of 2nd graders (even before losing hearing on one side!).
I have trouble keeping track of my own kids inside the house half the time. I heard one of them calling me earlier, and walked clear around the house in a circle saying "I hear you, but I don't see you" before finding her standing right near where I started my search in the first place. I should attach flags or flashing lights to them.
I say next Wednesday is a great day to celebrate!! If you haven't misplaced any kids yet - that's cause for celebration!!
Lori
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I don't blame Jim not wanting to wear an earring or pin,
I have been laughing at these comments while I read them even though they are very serious and frustrating like you all mention.
It's 2 1/2 years for me and I still try to put the phone on my bad side. Last night while I was reading the threads my son left his DVD player by the computer so I tried to put the earplug to my bad side not hearing a thing, think there was no disc in the player. Stupid me, bad ear I need the pin in front of me to see that I am deaf in the left ear.
eve
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How about a plastic shower cap-like thingy with a circle/slash sign or an out of order sign that just fits over your ear, kind of like a winch cover on a fancy yacht? Maybe out of leopard fabric with some rhinestones? Sort of like a little Barbie beret? Someone out there know how ta sew?
Capt Deb (http://i235.photobucket.com/albums/ee60/Captdeb_photos/pirate_girl_face_smirk_sm_clr-1.gif)
Total Fashion Queen
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PS I think I'm just going to have the word NO! tattooed on the inside part of my ear at the top. Not on the lobe, that spot is reserved for the dazzling earrings that my daughter in law makes. I want Hannah to do it on L.A. Ink. She does great script!
Capt Deb(http://i235.photobucket.com/albums/ee60/Captdeb_photos/pirate2.gif)
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Deb, You are soo funny! It pays to laugh. :D
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my 27 year old sister came in from out of town and stayed with us four days ... she was
constantly on wrong side and attacked me with a sharpie marker and now three days later
the hole in my lobe still has black in it >:( ...brat...she is the same age as my twins and the three
of them act worse than my 8 and 10 year old at times... 1980 may have been a bad year for
babies in this area :-\
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Oh, a sharpie! That sounds a lot less painful than a tattoo!
Lori
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I want some BLING!
I want a pair of "YES" and "NO" diamond earrings to wear when I go out in a crowd. That way there will be no doubt about which ear is which!
Move over Beyonce!
Capt Deb(http://i235.photobucket.com/albums/ee60/Captdeb_photos/emoticon___pirate_by_anya1916.gif)
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Ok Deb, Let me know where you find those earrings for no and yes. My love would get them for me.
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Would these do?
(http://images.etsy.com/all_images/1/1c3/241/il_430xN.14514419.jpg)
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=8018280 (http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=8018280)
Or these?
(http://www.trocadero.com/russmarko/items/597514/catphoto.jpg)
http://www.trocadero.com/russmarko/items/597514/item597514.html (http://www.trocadero.com/russmarko/items/597514/item597514.html)
Or perhaps these, listed on Ebay?
(http://i11.ebayimg.com/01/i/000/89/d9/0c9c_2.JPG)
I like the Ebay ones myself...
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Katie
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Now that is funny! I think I might actually order myself a pair of those!
I'm telling you, you can find ANYTHING on E-bay!
Lori
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I was thinking a ruby for deaf ear and an emerald for hearing ear...
Stop /go...
I threaded a piece of sewing thread soaked in alcohol threw the hole and still
have a black dot where the sharpie is in pierce hole... if it wasn't 500 miles I
might be tempted to drive over and give sis a sharpie mustache
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Cool ... but whats a guy to do ? :o
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Cool ... but whats a guy to do ? :o
You kidding? EVERYBODY wears earrings these days! :)
Take my word for it. I work at a busy library in Southeast Portland, Oregon, the very hippest part of what is currently considered to be one of the hippest cities on the planet. All kinds of men wear all kinds of ear decorations!
Be hip... wear earrings! (Although I admit those ear thingies that stretch out giant holes in your earlobes make me a little queasy. And no, I myself am NOT hip--partly cuz I'm too busy to figure out how to become hip, and honestly don't care anyway. :) ).
Nancy T.
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LOL .. I already have my skull pierced :o ... that's enough
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Maybe you could stick a red flag to the BAHA attachment? That sounds very manly. Just avoid running with the bulls, or you may be a target!
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"skull pierced" ::)
Joef,
That is hilarious! :D
4
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LOL .. I already have my skull pierced :o ... that's enough
Ha!! :)
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How's this for a pierced skull?
(http://i235.photobucket.com/albums/ee60/Captdeb_photos/skull_sword_through_head_lg_clr.gif)
Hey Joe! Next time you want a quiet weekend, Fedex me your BAHA and I'll get out me glue gun and I'll embellish it for ya for FREE! I gotta a ton of rhinestones and glitter leftover from the 80's and Dr Love has a fabulous collection of dayglo paint from the 70's!
Capt Deb(http://i235.photobucket.com/albums/ee60/Captdeb_photos/pirateface_sticking_out_tongue_sm_w.gif)
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PS
Katie, The Earrings are FABULOUS! I'm thinking Chicago 2009?
CaptDeb(http://i235.photobucket.com/albums/ee60/Captdeb_photos/pirateface_sticking_out_tongue_sm_w.gif)
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OK, I finially lost it. My best friend is alway on my left side. She just chats away. If we are walking I slow down and change sides after two or three times of this I say you are on my deaf side and if you want me to hear you will have to move this time. A few days ago she said you need to mark the deaf ear. Last weekend we went walking and I brought a marker. BIG AND BLACK. When she was chatting to my deaf ear I dropped back and changed sides she moved back to my left again then I took her hand and made a big black mark on it and said if the mark is toward me I can't hear you. Can't say she was exactly thrilled with a big black mark on her hand. Yesterday we walked and guess what she made a point of being on my right. Frustration will drive you to do strange things.
Sandy
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Guess you learned her one! Good on ya!! How bout carrying a few of those temporary tattoos and a wet sponge in a ziplock bag in your purse? A Big Black marker is really quicker, though!
Capt Deb(http://i235.photobucket.com/albums/ee60/Captdeb_photos/pirate2.gif)
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Sandy, I'm glad that you put the mark on her... and not on yourself...bet she won't forget again :D .
At school I have a name badge. I tell the kids to always come talk to me on the side the badge is and I'll be able to hear them..... works pretty well. But sometimes I get frustrated when they won't speak up so I can hear them (and believe me .... I've heard them loud so I know they can). I finally got to the point yesterday I got tired of telling the kids... 'I didn't hear you ....say it again please' so I said instead : "you can speak up so I can hear you.... or go sit down". Guess what - they speak up louder now :o
marg